Thoughts on being pregnant...so far

I wrote this post a week or 2 ago and am just now putting on the finishing touches and posting. So here you are.

- I've come to discover that the ugly rumor you hope is true when you are pregnant, is NOT true!! Let me clarify, you cannot eat whatever you want when you are pregnant. Unless you are one of those women who can't put on weight. I was SHOCKED the past few times I stupidly stepped on the scale. I'm not even sure how you can put on so much weight in such a short amount of time! And I certainly don't feel like I was eating enough to justify that kind of weight gain! I've now decided NOT to step on the scale between Dr appointments. I already only eat when I'm hungry, eat more fruit and veggies then ever before and otherwise try and be smart. NOTE: after I wrote this blog, I had a Dr appointment in which I weighed in at a more reasonable weight than I had thought. So that was cool. This no longer seems as stressful as it had before. Of course those additional hormones don't help anything.

- I decided this morning that I love my child but have been confused about whether or not I really love it because I don't have a face attached yet. But I'm getting to know it's kicks, it's bounces on my bladder, and would be devestated if anything happened to THIS baby! So I think that's love. I can't picture myself cuddling a slimy 9lb anything I just shot out of "there" but I'm pretty sure that when I get to meet the one that has been growing inside my belly I'll be nothing short of enamored with it. And if not, we have a life time to connect! But I am relieved to realize that I love THIS child! Even though I have no idea who he/she is.

- Wondering why I haven't blogged in forever? I'm so dead tired by the time we finish dinner that I rarely make it more than another hour before I'm asleep on the couch! Mark is gracious enough to clean up most nights and I'll sometimes sleep until he takes me to bed or I'll wake up after an hour and work on a few things, but am otherwise down for the count. This week I have aspirations of cleaning the house BEFORE dinner a couple nights. I think the motivation of cleaning to get food will help me out.

- Part of what is contributing to my lack of blogging and tiredness is my schedule. For the past 6 weeks or so I've been picking up extra hours at work to cover for another admin who left. And the past 2 weeks I was working even more hours to cover for my boss who was gone. Next week things will be back to normal, which will be nice since I'm falling behind in life.

- The anticipation of a new being in our home is motivating me to get a little more organized. I'm hoping I can make some necessary changes with my mom's help when she's here in August. I'm ITCHING to make some adjustments and improvements on our little place. The $$ part always scares me though.

- Yes, we are finding out what we are having and will be able to tell people in a couple weeks. It's VERY excited and strange that there are only 2 options. I have no "feeling" either way but will be excited to attach a gender to the little one. Although I still can't kick the habit of calling it "the kid". For some reason it seems too strange for me to be expecting my very own baby. So calling it "the kid" is nice a middle groun ;)

Lest this post makes it seem like I'm upset or bitter or something about elements of being pregnant, I'm NOT!! From what I'm hearing, I'm actually having a pretty comfortable pregnancy. All the first trimester symptoms of nausea, food aversions, sensitivty to smell, etc are all gone and other than being more tired, peeing all the time, and a growing belly, not much is different. I am EXTREMELY thankful to be perculating this baby. I keep thinking of the months it took us to get here and how much I've dreamed of this phase of my life and am just so thankful for my husband, our little condo, and this little one. This isn't exactly what I had imagined it would be (I think I pictured us with more money), but I wouldn't trade our life for anything!!