Life Through the Eyes of Mrs Peeples

Done!

2011-08-11T14:38:00.000-07:00

I decided yesterday that I'm finished with blogging for this current phase of my life. I guess I barely picked it back up anyway but honestly, there are SO many other ways I'd rather spend my time and that take priority. I also have the major battle of trying not to post things that are too personal or that I shouldn't be sharing about my kids for whatever reason. Right now I cherish my free time and I like to watch tv, veg out, read, email/facebook and at the moment one of my girls is awake from her nap.

So... thus ends my blogging career. If you want to continue hearing about my world, become my friend on facebook or contact me directly because I love to talk with other adults, especially since my days are filled with little ones.

My "real" life

2011-07-13T22:39:00.000-07:00

No, I don't have a hidden occupation you aren't aware of... my "real" life is a mom. I call this my "real" life because it's not all about the smiling pictures I try and post. Let me tell you about the other night:

Monday - Mark has a major class assignment due at the end of the week so needs extra work time and I had to do a couple things at church so we decided to merge them so Mark could work late. I took the girls for a quick stop at the church office in the afternoon and then we met Mark for dinner. It went pretty well except that Sophie wanted to eat when dinner was just over (keep in mind, we've only been there for like 30 minutes at a sit-down place). I took her to the car to nurse (I could have nursed at the restaurant but that didn't seem as comfy in our tight booth with people watching, as the privacy of the car). Mark and Millie followed shortly after once they had paid.

Sophie ate, Millie played, and then we took Mark back to work. On the way home Millie started crying. I'm still not sure why. She cried the entire way home. We got home and I took Sophie out of her car seat and sat with her on the couch motioning for Millie to come sit next to us. The crying got worse and she pointed at the bouncy seat indicating she wanted me to put Sophie in there. So I did (poor kid hardly gets held it feels like). Millie proceeded to cry hysterically for the next like 30 minutes. I'm still not sure what was going on. She was upset about nothing and everything. She wanted everything and nothing.

After handling the day really well (first day back with the girls by myself after vacation), the night crashed. I called Mark in tears saying I was at the end of my rope, he left to come home.

Today, we spent 30 minutes in tears, again. This time she was super tired (having fallen asleep on the way home) and wanted her pacifier (I gave it to her when she said she wanted to nap without eating lunch), but once she had it, wanted lunch. So I told her she had to leave it in her crib if she wanted to come down for lunch. She wouldn't do it but didn't want to go into her crib for nap time... 30+ minutes later she was finally crying herself to sleep. I gave her more than enough chances and she didn't cry for too long before she fell asleep. She proceeded to take a 2.5 hour nap when she's an hour long nap kid.

That is my "real" life.

I've been spending part of Millie's nap time reading up on my parenting books and journaling. In other words, my devotional time. I figure that spending my days with a toddler means I need to be all juiced up on Jesus so I can make it through the day. I'm trying to keep a big-picture perspective and remember that this time is short compared to all of life and I'll look back on these days with wonderful memories and wish I had more patience. Today I was glad to have had more patience and kept my cool. My nap-time-Jesus-time helps I think. Although as much as I love my daughter I'm sometimes surprised at how glad I am when 8pm bedtime rolls around ;)

I'm trying to decide if I should have a chocolate pudding treat or fold laundry before Sophie wakes to eat and go to bed. Think I'll go with the pudding and see how I feel after that ;)

What a difference 2 months can make...

2011-07-05T22:36:00.001-07:00

Tomorrow (7/6) is Sophie's 2 month birthday. Seriously can't believe how fast it has gone! The fun thing about my second child is I'm more relaxed and not so stressed out and am enjoying every stage a little more, but also looking forward to what is coming and seeing who Sophie will become ;) I find myself wanting her to grow up and not wanting it at the same time.

So... I'm in my 3rd week of trying to count calories and getting back into working out. Well, the 3rd week technically starts today. After the first week I lost 5lbs! Which was awesome since I'd had zero weight loss in about 3 weeks.

I haven't weighed myself this week because I'm not home with my usual scale. From my best guess, the weight loss is not that great. Partly because we're at Mark's Parent's place and... well... lets just say my mother-in-law knows her way around a kitchen! I'm trying my best but also being realistic and not obsessed. The good news is that I've already worked out like 4 times in the 5 days we've been here and saw improvement from my run/walk on Saturday to my run/walk on the same route on Monday. I was pretty excited about that! Now when running I don't just try and keep from dying but actually find a good pace and feel a little better.

Below I've included pictures of myself (the best I could find) from 2 months ago to today. I'm still 2o+ over where I was before getting pregnant with Millie but hoping that with the calorie awareness and workouts I'll be down there eventually, preferably sooner than later. But I do have to say that you really have to eat a stupid amount of food to be nursing, working out, chasing a toddler around AND not losing any weight ;)

5/6

7/2

Year in pics... week 5 & 6

2011-07-05T22:28:00.000-07:00

This week we are enjoying some R&R at Mark's parent's place on Whidbey Island in WA. Mark had to return to work for a couple days but the girls and I are sticking around for a while longer.

Week 5: This picture was taken last Saturday at the local 4th of July fair. Millie's first time on any rides and she loved them!

Week 6: Today Millie played for a while with water on the back deck. SO cute!! I selected this picture because it has Jean (my mother-in-law) in the background smiling at Sophie.

Week 6 #2: Couldn't resist including this one for the week. Check out that beautiful smile! I LOVE this face!! There were like 12 pictures in this series and I had to keep pretty much all of them because I want to always remember the many faces of this adorable baby!

My first experience with Collard Greens

2011-06-28T13:39:00.001-07:00

Also in our first week of the farm box was collard greens. I have NEVER even eaten them before and kind of pictured something southern and pickled (hate anything pickled). We get recipes with the produce each week but I didn't like the one included so found a new one online. And it turned out fantastic!! That's what I love about getting the farm box each week, I don't control what I can't and I have to figure out a way to make it work ;)

First I cut the stems off and cut the leaves into 1 in pieces.

Then you boil the leaves for 20 minutes.

Then saute in butter and garlic... I figured that you couldn't really go wrong with butter and garlic ;) Although I couldn't really picture what it was like to saute leaves, but it worked!

I may have over-cooked a few of the leaves but otherwise they were super good! I think I would actually buy collard greens just to try this recipe again!

And of course, trying to do all this was in between kids crying, trying to climb up on me, upset she can't sit on the counter while I chop and cook... what looks like a simple process was full of tears, lots of patience and a little "tuning" it out on my part ;) And that is why I rarely cook much more than what I can pop in the oven or boil or something really simple!

Year in pics... week 3 and 4

2011-06-28T13:30:00.001-07:00

I know I missed last week so here you are... the pic that represents last week:

I know I already posted this pic, but when I looked back on last week's pics I liked this one the most as a representation of our week.

And here is week 4's pic:

Sophie has been smiling for a couple weeks and we have yet to capture it on camera. Actually, we haven't had a chance to try. So yesterday after she ate (when she's the happiest), I propped her up and pulled out the camera. Of course, Millie wanted to be part of the fun. She won't pose for pictures these days but I managed to capture some really cute shots of her interacting with Sophie. I love this one because Sophie is really into Millie, who is doing something she thinks is pretty fun ;)

Here are some of my other favorites from that series:

What's going on today

2011-06-22T15:45:00.000-07:00

I don't have a picture for the week yet. And to be honest, if I took one right now it would look EXACTLY like my week 1 pic because that is what we are currently doing.

But here is what is going on this week:
- Last week I didn't care when/how Sophie slept as long as she napped. This week I feel the need to train her to nap in her bassinet vs the bouncy seat. It normally takes anywhere from 5 to 30 minutes swaddled with the pacifier propped in her mouth (with my close supervision) to get her to sleep in there and it lasts anywhere from 15 minutes to an hour. Interestingly she sleeps great in there during the first shift at night. I try watching for her sleep queues but I must not be doing it right or something because after about the first yawn I wrap her up and put her in a place to nap and it can take her another 30 minutes to nap... or more. Sometimes I feel like I spend half the try trying to get her to sleep. Any suggestions? It feels kind of weird to be back here again ;)

- I've started 2 things this week: 1) running (ya!!) and 2) counting calories. After not losing ANY weight for over 3 weeks I decided to try something new and after 1.5 days of using myfitnesspal.com on my phone, I'm really enjoying it! This afternoon I find myself constantly wanting to grab for a snack only to realize that if I eat something now it's fewer calories I get later for my dinner out with some mom friends. Although we're going to a place that is known for their desserts so I can't decide if I should spend my calories on a healthy dinner or yummy dessert. I'm leaning towards dessert ;) I couldn't find their nutrition facts online so am hoping they have some there because it would be nice to get the exact amount.

I ran a few spurts during our family 4 mile walk on Saturday and felt pretty good so after not making it to the gym at 5am Monday morning (that was just too ambitious), I opted for a run after Mark got home that night. It was almost 3 miles and felt FANTASTIC! I run a little over half. I was sore yesterday and did the same run again but instead of it feeling fantastic it felt HARD. Of course, I was still sore from the night before and it was pretty warm out. Today I'm just really sore so am taking the next couple days off. Friday morning I'm hitting a Zumba class at the gym for the second week in a row (wow! is that fun and fast) and Saturday morning we'll do another family walk. Super glad to be back into it and realized that this time around I'm doing it almost more for sanity and time alone as for exercise.

Okay, that's all I have for now. Will try and take a pic to post this week.

More pictures of the week

2011-06-19T22:18:00.001-07:00

Millie ALWAYS wants to hold her sister. It's cute ;)

Although Millie has taken to pushing her out of her lap when she's "finished".

Millie never lets us put anything in her hair. Actually, she lets us put things in her hair but she immediately takes them out. But we managed to get her to keep her pigtails in for about 20 minutes the other. She looked SO cute!!

We had Sophie dedicated today. She was adorable! Millie doesn't like to cooperate for pictures any more though ;) Notice their matching dresses? Adorable!!

Farm share

2011-06-19T21:44:00.000-07:00

Last year we split a half farm share with Barb and this year we are sharing a full share with another small family. Today was our first produce day! And below is the first results of our produce... strawberry rhubarb pie.

before baking

After baking

First slice

Probably not the best pie I've ever eaten but not bad. To be honest, I'm not sure I've ever made a pie with a crust on the bottom and top, so that was fun. Although the homemade crust is normally one of my favorite parts but this one felt almost a little tough... not enough water or mixed too much?

Now on to the collard greens, asparagus, lettuce and parsley. Any suggestions?

Picture of the week

2011-06-16T15:09:00.000-07:00

It takes me a couple days to have a moment where I can leave the girls unattended enough to grab the camera, another couple of days to be able to get the pics loaded and sorted through and another day to get them posted. Right now Millie is on my lap writing with pen all over my filing but it allows me a sec to write this so I'm not complaining ;)

Week 2 picture:

I sometimes put Sophie down on the playmat for some floor time and Millie likes to get underthere with her. Which means I can't leave them because Millie will climb all over Sophie. I did get Millie to stop trying to sit under the thing and lay down instead. Anyway, this was a cute moment.

Which turned into this...

And here's another one just for fun. We give Sophie a bath a couple times a week on nights when Millie doesn't have one. I suggested to him this particular night that we hadn't gotten any pics of her in the bath yet so Mark grabbed the camera and snapped a few.

And this is what was going on while that was happening.

Now if you'll excuse me I need to pick up my desk. Millie is taking all the papers from the right side, writing on them with the pen and moving them to the left side so they are all over the place and on the floor. But hey, I had time to write/post!

Today...

2011-06-15T10:47:00.000-07:00

Not sure what else to call this post. I've started about 4 posts since my last one but never have a chance to finish. Normally because some kid wants my attention, like right now... Millie is saying "up" over and over again at my legs.

Was going to write more but...

Okay, I'm back. Sophie has been asleep for over 2 hours!! I think I've trained her to sleep in her vibrating bouncy seat. Which is great! Except it's not her bed. I debated yesterday if I should start trying to train her to sleep in her non-vibrating bed instead and decided it doesn't matter. She won't be in this phase for very long and that day will come soon enough. She sleeps for about 4-5 hours when she first goes to bed at night, normally goes back to sleep for 30-60 minutes and then wakes and I let her sleep with me while nursing her back to sleep. I'm a little concerned about having my tiny baby in bed with me but I've never moved and cuddling with her is so sweet! And this phase also won't last forever. She's nearly 6 weeks and we'll be ready to transition her to her own room in a couple months. So we can transition then. Right now I'm getting a reasonable amount of sleep and it's working (although will probably change tomorrow, you know how things are, the minute you think you have it figured out, it changes).

Millie has taken to waking around 6:30 and I let her fuss in her crib until after 7. We thought we had her figured out when we decided to give her the pacifier when she woke up and at first it helped her sleep for 30-60 more minutes (ya!) but now it's more like 15 and she never goes back to sleep. But I figure it doesn't hurt her to hangout in there a little longer and it helps give me time to get ready or sleep for 15 more minutes and inevitably when I move Sophie out of my bed to make space for Millie, she wakes up.

Currently Millie is upstairs unsupervised. She's also being very quiet, so I'm going to go wrap this up and go check on her.

The year in pics

2011-06-10T10:21:00.000-07:00

I know, I'm SO far behind!! It's been like a year since I posted anything. Not sure if this will resurrect my blog but we'll give it a shot.

Instead of trying to recap the last year I'll just start with this week...

I'm taking cues from another mom friend and am going to take 1 pic a week that some how reflects our life that week. So here is week 1's pic taken 6/8/11.

In the picture...
Sophie wrapped up asleep in her bouncy seat on the kitchen table. Funny the things you do differently with your second... put them up high when you are NOT supposed to do that but it's better to keep Sophie out of reach of Millie, who doesn't understand not poking or laying on her sister. Millie is a GREAT big sister and LOVES to hold Sophie, but doesn't understand that things like poking her eyes and putting her entire body weight on any part of Sophie isn't okay.

My coffee cup on the counter, I LOVE drinking coffee these days. Too bad it's full caffeinated because I would drink it all day long.

Lastly, you see Millie (eating a sponge, I told her not to after I caught this pic). Millie CANNOT get enough water play. She drinks it, splashes it, plays with it on her tea cart/tray, outside, and in it when possible. Anything she can do with water she will do. So every once in a while I set her up at the sink with various bowls and cups and utensils and LOTS of towels because the water gets everywhere, a bib, and a trickle of water from the faucet and let her have fun. This particular day the game was good for about 40 minutes! The day after it lasted about 15 minutes and wasn't quite as interesting.

Update

2010-05-14T07:06:00.001-07:00

Yes, I know, it's been a while. But I did return to work... so that's my defense ;) I've been back at work now for 3 months and I can't believe Millie is 5.5 months old!! She's started sitting up, grabbing her feet, rolling to the side (but not over, yet), eating a little rice cereal at dinner, been weaned off her pacifier and being (if it's possible) cute than ever!!

Here are some new pics. Well, they are new to the blog but are from March... trying to pick up where I left off.

Reflection ... the past 7 years

2010-03-06T12:30:00.000-08:00

Friday March 5th around 11:30am I sat at a red light on Highway 99 on my way back from run/walking Terwilliger with my running partner, Trisha. I'm in the minivan and Millie is fast asleep in the back seat with the bathrobe belt still supporting her forehead (left over from the run (see 2 blog posts ago), but continuing to support her head from falling forward.

I looked over at the car next to me and it occurred to me that I'm not driving a pick-up, like I used to in Montana or the Mustang that I've enjoyed for the past 4 years. I'm driving a minivan, boring, uninteresting, and completely lost and unnoticeable in the flow of traffic. And I couldn't be happier! I just finished a workout (something that feels like "me" - see last blog post), sipping on a half decaf Starbucks black coffee, with my "splurge" Wendy's frosty in the cup holder next to me, and I looked back at my little one thought about how excited I was to spend the day with her. I love that I wasn't disappointed to not be "free" to do other things or spend my time differently. I'm glad I wasn't overwhelmed by spending the day partly alone with her. But really actually genuinely excited to be with her for the day!

Further up highway 99 I thought about how this road has been in my life since I moved here, 7 years ago. Three months after I moved to Portland, still without a job, I applied at a drive-thru Starbucks only half a mile from my current home. If someone had told me 7 years ago that I'd be happily married for over 2 years, enjoying my 3 month old daughter, and living in a little condo just up the road from where I was doing a job that was my last-ditch-effort, I would have been pretty excited... possibly disappointed it would have taken so long (7 years is much longer than I anticipated these things happening), but still excited.

I also thought back on the route Trisha and I had just finished running/walking, Terwilliger. I used to live quite a bit closer to this route and have run it since I moved here. When I moved to Portland I was signed up to run a race in Spokane with my first running partner, from Montana, in May. So I started training on this route. After that race I stopped running until 2004 when I picked back up again and trained and ran the Seattle half marathon Thanksgiving weekend with my mom, only training for about 3 months (that was hard!). About that same time my boyfriend broke up with me and I remember telling another "potential" guy how I never would want to run a marathon. About that same time in 2004, while looking for more race options with people I knew, I hooked up with Trisha, my current running partner. 2 years later we ran out first marathon. When we started running together we were both single, we met, dated, got engaged to, and married our husbands, all while continuing to run together. We call ourselves accidental best friends because we didn't go into it planning to be friends, just running partners, but spending so much time together (sometimes 4 hours on a training run each weekend), you get pretty deep!

I ran Terwilliger as my midweek run when I worked at the job I had between Starbucks and Sunset. I would change into my running clothes after work, put the top down on the Mustang and drive to Terwilliger, belt out a 3 to 4 mile run and drive home, stopping at the tanning place on the way back. It was on one of those runs that I remember thinking about the guy I had just met and how he'd said he would love to follow me around for a week. 16 months later we were married.

Now I'm back running Terwilliger with my 3 month old baby, who's head is braced against her car seat with a bathrobe belt. My running is significantly slower, I now walk the uphills, but I couldn't be more happy with my little life. I have a terrific husband! A beautiful baby girl! A cute little condo! A tight but manageable budget. I no longer get to drive the Mustang as often, have time to myself, or even get to buy clothes or eat out much. The past 7 years have been quite a journey. I've held 4 different jobs, 2 temporary jobs, 2 relationships, 1 almost relationship, 3 cars, many different ministry positions, lived in 5 different homes, one of which was temporary and one of which I now own, engaged, married, and now with a little baby girl who likes to squeal and talk to me all the time.

So that's my reflection on the past 7 years. I would have never picked this exact route to my current place but am SO thankful that God had something better in mind. In my preferred timing it would have all happened faster and with less occasional heartache. But I feel like I've had so many great experiences, had to rely so heavily on God, learn to be grateful for the things I didn't choose, which have all shaped who I am now and am learning to accept not being in the exact place I pictured 7 years ago. But I'm the first to say that although I always have a plan and think it's the best one, God's plan is certainly better!

What makes me feel like me

2010-03-04T22:01:00.000-08:00

Shortly after Millie was born I read a couple different books (not the entire book, just a chapter or page or 2, which is all I've been able to get through) that talked about not losing your identity when you become a mom. Given how much your life is completely revolving around your little one initially, I can see how losing your identity is easy. And I think it actually starts when you are pregnant. I'm realizing that I haven't felt like "me" since I got pregnant, a year ago.

But, I took the advice of these books and have been realizing the things that make me feel like "me". Although I'm not sure I would have known what those things were until I start to do them post-baby.

So here are some of them:

1) Driving the Mustang - I stopping enjoying the Mustang while I was pregnant because it was too uncomfortable on my pregnant body. But wow! The first time I got in that car after Millie arrived, it was SO fun!! I get to drive it at least every other week lately, even for short trips to the grocery store, and love it!! I accelerate too fast, rush around corners when possible, and have been able to put the top down at least once, even just half a mile home from the grocery store.

2) Running and going to the gym - Not that I enjoy either of these activities, but my running partner and I are back out on our long route once a week, run another day during the week and made it to the gym (for the first time post-baby) yesterday morning. We've been running together since before her or I knew our husbands, much less were married with a kid! So it's a piece of me that I have enjoyed bringing back to life since Millie was born. We did continue to hit the gym while I was pregnant, but haven't much since the half marathon last April.

3) Scrapbooking - It's a small thing but Mark graciously made himself available last Saturday so I could scrapbook all afternoon. It was fun to just work on this crafty piece of my life for an afternoon. It's another thing I've done for several years that I've kind of missed since Millie was born (not that I always scrapbooked that often but it's different when the little one you want to scrapbook about doesn't give you enough free time to pick it back up.

4) Time alone with Mark - Definitely not something we've been able to squeeze in much. But getting Millie to sleep in the crib in her own room has helped and her going to bed earlier helps too because we can actually go to bed at the same time. I've missed being able to talk with Mark during little times like getting ready for bed at night and getting ready together in the morning. Last Thursday we went to dinner alone together for the first time since Millie was born. We've been away from her at the same time one other time and that was at his parent's house over Christmas and we ran to Walmart for a quick errand. We were gone 45 minutes and I worried that Millie would need to eat. I don't think she knew I was even gone! But over dinner we were able to debrief our days, eat at the same time, and enjoy some uninterrupted time together. He also let me drive the Mustang, even though we weren't going barely a mile away from Barb's, where Millie was.

5) Doing my nails - It makes me feel special and girlie and put together when my nails are pink. I figured this was something that would have to go when Millie came along. Although it's now dropped to once a week instead of twice a week, I've enjoyed being able to maintain this small thing. Again, Mark helps with this too because he'll take Millie while I do my nails and let them dry.

6) Wearing my yellow shoes - (I'm really not vain, just enjoy these little things ;) I have flat, pointy-toe'd yellow shoes that I've had for over a year and LOVE to wear. I've actually worn them so much they are practically formed to my feet. I was able to wear these shoes while pregnant but I couldn't see them over my giant belly ;) And right after Millie was born I barely got out of my sweats. And cute yellow shoes don't go with sweats, even if they are black ;)

So I'm enjoying adding a few "me" things back into my life and not feeling guilty about it. Most of these things are cheap, some even good for me, and simply take a little time out of my day or a cute outfit to accompany. I'd love to know what other moms do to maintain pieces of themselves...

The things we do to our kids ;)

2010-03-01T16:52:00.000-08:00

Let me explain. On our weekend walks/runs with our friends Peter and Trisha, Millie rides in the stroller, mostly asleep. We've found that her head frequently falls forward and bounces around in a potentially dangerous (to her spine) way. We want to keep being able to put her in the stroller so to solve the "problem" we tried this method of loosely bracing her head with a bathrobe belt. It worked great! Looks funny, but worked well ;) She's like karate kid baby ;)

More of life with Millie... because I just can't get enough!

2010-02-25T22:31:00.000-08:00

The last you heard from me, I was a little freaked about going back to work. Well, we've been at it for 2 weeks and it's going really well!! Oddly, the biggest challenge is adjusting to our new work environment (they moved our work space to the children's department, which is more "kid friendly"). It's nice to not have pressure to keep quiet and all that, but we're still getting to know our new office neighbors, big and little ;) But so far so good! And I really enjoy keeping Millie with me during the day.

Tonight Mark and I went on our first date without Millie. It was a far cry from last Friday night when we went to dinner and took her with us... she got fussy part way through and tried to eat but wouldn't and then cried and then we got her fed and... so tonight was nice ;) Tonight we went to a restaurant only about half a mile from where Millie was, at Barb's, so we didn't feel like we were too far. We got to sit and talk and enjoy some messy burgers and remember the last time we were there, which was when we had just started dating, talk about how much we enjoy our life and feel like the transition to parenthood is going well, all uninterrupted! Although we always love being with our baby, it was rather sweet to have 1.5 hours out by ourselves ;)

I'm not taking pictures as often because I'm at work during most days but here are some we've taken recently.

Millie is eating her hands all the time these days. She can also grab toys (or whatever is right there), but only really when they are already in her hand. We sometimes put her in the corner of the couch to hangout.

On Saturday's we do a walk/run with some friends (I've mentioned this before). Last weekend Mark decided to try the front pack instead of the stroller (he walks with Millie while I run ahead). Other than the fact that she pee'd through her pants early on (but we didn't know), it went really well! She stayed awake more and really seemed to enjoy it. This picture was taken at the end of the walk when she had fallen asleep.

This is the, "what's that light that keeps snapping at me?" look. But check out those eyes!!

I know this one is blurry, but I love this face! She is also spitting out a little as she tells me something. She is drooling ALL the time!

There's that beautiful smile!!

Tummy time!

After work Millie and I get home by 5 most days and have what I like to call, "Millie time". It's because while at work all day I can't pay as much attention to her so when we get home I try and give her lots of attention, except when I have to be making dinner. I use her as an excuse to just sit and rest a little after work by rocking her and letting her sleep in my arms during her evening short nap.

As if pacifiers aren't hard enough to find when you need them... we call this one the "invisible pacifier" because, in case you can't tell, it can blend well. This is one of about 4 different brands and types of pacifiers currently floating between our home, the diaper bag and my work. Someone had suggested trying a couple different brands to look for one she might keep in on her own. She does keep this one in a little better than some but in the middle of the night, in the dark, it's not the easiest one to find ;)

And this is how we end most evenings. We're pretty excited that Millie is falling asleep by 10 most nights. We put her down shortly after and if she's asleep nice and good, we just wrap up her arms tightly and she's out! Whala! In fact, we try and keep her up for a couple hours before her 10pm bed time and by the time we get her in her pjs and feed her, she sometimes falls asleep within 5 to 10 minutes. Also (less I speak too soon) the past 2 nights I've only had to get up with her once, which is pretty sweet! The first night she slept from 2:30 until after 7. The second night she didn't wake up until 6:30! I don't really expect this will be a habit forever, but it's been nice the past few nights.

Returning to work

2010-02-13T22:59:00.000-08:00

It's Saturday night and all I can think about is how on Monday I return to work. I get to take Millie with me, which is pretty cool and I'm really thankful that I have the opportunity to take my baby with me. But I'm nervous about how it will go. I think it will work after we find our groove, but the unknown always scares me. I've so enjoyed my time at home with baby Millie and am a sad that during the time I'm at work my attention will be kind of divided. However, I'm excited about going back to work as well because I really enjoy my job and the people I work with... just the unknown is scary. Trust God... trust God... why is that always so hard to remember?

And because blog posts are just a lot better with pictures, check out my beautiful baby! Now I'm off to feed that beauty and spend the next 45 minutes trying to get her to sleep in her own bed (she likes to suck on the pacifier while falling asleep but can't hold it in herself, so I have to stand there and hold it in for her. And she likes to not stay asleep and wake up every minute or 2 for a while ;) But it's so worth it and I'll look back on these days with such fond memories!! At least she's starting to fall asleep before midnight ;)

Millie's great adventure to Montana

2010-02-09T13:54:00.001-08:00

Last Thursday Millie and I flew to Billings, Montana to visit her grandparents and meet Aunt Stini. We left really early so Millie slept through both flights on the way there. I carried her in the sling around the airport and found that it didn't work so great. It's a fantastic sling but hurt my back and Millie likes to look out, which I couldn't figure out how to do in the sling without having hang on to her with one hand (and isn't the point of the sling so you don't have to hang on to them?) So I got a front pack for the way home and it worked WAY better! Millie likes to sleep against your chest or look out, so either position with the front pack worked well. On the way home she was awake for most of the first flight but seemed completely oblivious to being on a plane except her interest in watching people. And she was mildly fussy before falling asleep at the end of the first flight. Although it worked out because even with getting her in and out of the front pack as needed (apparently you can't wear your baby for take off and landing), she slept until we arrived in Portland. All in all she traveled fantastically! Although I ended up a little tired from hauling Millie and all my stuff around the airport. But I seemed to need it all.

We had a great adventure flying and a great time visiting with my parents, Christina, and friends. Here are some pics:

Bonding with Aunt Stini. She told our parents that since she had school and work she got "first dibs" on holding Millie when she was home ;) The first night we pulled a rocker from the office to the dining room doorway to the kitchen so we could rock with Millie and talk with mom in the kitchen. By the way, that's my new hair cut. It's fun!

Millie and Christina playing. Cuddles (the dog) likes to be in the center of everything that's going on so nearly stepped and laid on Millie while trying to get our attention. It was funny.

Millie talking with Grammy.

More talking.

Saturday morning we invited my long time friend Josie and her son and husband to breakfast. We've known each other for over 20 years!! Josie looked great but still feeling somewhat sick, I hadn't gotten dressed or done my hair by breakfast. We had fun reconnecting and meeting eah other's kids. Her little Lincoln is about 20 months.

Later on Saturday mom and I went for our one and only workout (I was supposed to do at least 3, oh well). We borrowed an extra pair of Yak Traks for me to wear since it's snowy there. We did somewhere between 4.5 and 5.5 miles that day walking/running in the snow. It was fun training "Montana" style in the snow.

Millie and Cuddles. When Millie started to fall over a little Cuddles kind of freaked out. Cuddles ignored Millie for the most part. They'll have fun playing more when Millie is older.

Each morning when Millie would wake at some ungodly hour and not fall back asleep, I would bring her up to my parents and enjoy some additional sleep. The first morning it was just after 5am and I guess she sat in their bed and talked to them for a while before falling asleep. The second morning it wasn't until 6. The third morning it was after 7. Although she had originally woken up at 4am and wouldn't go back to sleep but that seemed a little too early. They really enjoyed their time with her each morning and I enjoyed some extra sleep!

Millie 2 months

2010-02-03T10:45:00.001-08:00

Millie was 2 months old on Friday the 29th. Wow!! Time has sure flown by!!

Her 2 month appointment was on Monday. She weighed in at 13lbs 14oz and 25in long. The Dr said she is above the 95% percentile on both. Funny kid! She takes after her father... he was over 11lbs at birth! Now I understand why people keep saying she looks big for 2 months. She is!!

This picture was taken a couple weeks ago but is so cute. We just love Millie's little personality that is starting to show. She has come cute funny things she does. All of which we just love to pieces!!

Millie likes to suck on her pacifier before going to sleep. Sometimes she doesn't need it to go to sleep, just during the transition to sleeping time. She still can't hold it in on her own.

This is Millie's nightly routine. She gets rocked for a bit before she goes to bed. Sometimes she falls asleep and sometimes we put her down before she's all the way asleep. But normally Mark rocks with her for a while. She likes her daddy rocking time.

Just a cute picture of Millie. Love these pants on her!

I wish this picture didn't load side ways but it's my current favorite. I have it posted on our fridge. It's just so funny with her little face and finger. She's in the middle of telling us something ;)

Life with Millie - 8 weeks

2010-01-27T13:57:00.001-08:00

Millie was 8 weeks on Sunday. Can't believe it's already been 8 weeks!! I remember so vividly the week before she was born and it seemed like she was never coming!! So to already be at 8 weeks is crazy!

Here are some highlights from the past few weeks:

Millie meeting her Uncle JR. We think she was a little overwhelmed by his beard. She was quite amused by him though! JR, Molly and my dad were in town almost 2 weeks ago. It was partly work and partly pleasure. We had a great time with them!

This is Millie in her bath. She likes her bath time! We bathe her pretty much every other night. Last night we actually took the net thing out so she was more in her bath and upright. I think she liked it a little better. Easier to wiggle her legs around. So cute!!

And for the record, I don't really know how to get these pictures upright.

Millie sleeping on Grandpa Rick. Grandpa Rick was great at taking the "early shift" holding Millie when/if she didn't go back to sleep.

Millie meeting her second cousin who is about 5 weeks older than her (yes, he is 5 weeks older). It was fun for these cousins to meet. They were good sports about letting us take pictures.

We had a busy weekend when family was in town. After a family lunch in Salem (where the last picture was taken) we had a gathering at Barb's. Both served as opportunities for everyone to see dad, Jr and Molly, but also to meet Millie. In this picture we swapped "kids" with my cousin Michael and his wife during the dinner at Barb's.

Couldn't help but take a picture of Millie in this really cute outfit!! The leggings were adorable on her chubby little legs ;)

I took this picture on Monday. Millie is starting to suck on her fists. She can't hold them in place long enough to really get soothed by the sucking but she's trying more often. It's so cute and wet!

Mark plays with Millie when he gets home from work. Here they are enjoying time on her playmat with her giraffe friend that she likes to talk to. I love her outfit in this picture! She wears these cute nightgowns to bed so midnight diaper changing is easier. The onesie doesn't entirely match and Mark picked out the socks and likes to pull them up as high as they go so they are more like knee highs.

Millie is doing well at living. She smiles a lot and sometimes carries on conversations with us and we're getting better at reading her signs when she is hungry and tired. We've worked her onto a good daily flow of eating, staying awake, and sleeping. I like it because it helps me know what we're doing next ;) She does still eat about every 2 hours, although easily sleeps through feedings to go as long as 3 or occasionally 4 hours, but only when sleeping. I sometimes think I should keep her awake more during the day but she's so fussy when she's sleepy that I hate to make her stay awake.

Speaking of sleeping, she takes 1 or 2 long naps a day and 1 or 2 short naps. She sleeps best in her car seat (but when she's awake doesn't like the car seat unless it's in motion in the car or stroller), bouncy seat or in your arms. The best way to wake her from a long nap during the day is to try putting her in her bed ;) She still isn't going to sleep before around 11:30 or midnight and I'm slowly working to put her to bed a little earlier (although last night didn't work) and get her to fall asleep in her bed... a work in progress. Within the next week we plan to transition her from the bassinet in our room to the crib in her room. I don't feel emotionally ready to have her out of our room yet. Makes checking on her and nighttime feedings really easy. But we think she is getting a little big for the bassinet (always ends up with her head against one side or the other).

Next weekend Millie and I are heading to Montana for 5 days to visit my parents. I'm excited to travel with her (although a little nervous about how she'll do) and excited for my parents to see her again, but will be sad to be away from Mark.

The big thing for me is going back to work (with Millie) in 2.5 weeks. I'm starting to mentally think about this transition and getting excited and anxious to go back to work. I'm excited to be back at work and be around adults again. But a little anxious to see how Millie will do. My work people are great though and willing to give it a try! I will miss being at home to getting things done during the week like cleaning so we don't have to do it on the weekends. But I will still get Friday's off and am only working part-time.

I'm trying to squeeze in 4 workouts a week. They are either a walk/run by myself or with someone (and Millie), 30-60 minutes each time. Or 20-30 minutes of pilates at home. The pilates is really hard!! But I like the idea of toning along with cardio. Yesterday I signed up for a half marathon on April 11th. Not sure how well I'll do but now I'm committed! The farthest distance of run/walked so far is 3.5 miles so I have a ways to go ;)

More on life with Millie - 6 weeks

2010-01-14T13:51:00.000-08:00

Not sure why this picture loaded side ways, but it's cute even with your head turned. I especially like the bow ;)
It's been 6 weeks and I'm cleared to start working out again. Last week I took Millie for a 1.25 mile walk in the stroller. I didn't think it would be much of a workout since I was only walking but with a good sized hill and pushing the stroller, it was brutal!! I couldn't believe how hard it was and how out of shape I am!!

We're supposed to be walk/running a half Marathon in early April so need to get started. So we have a plan to do a walk/run with our good friends Peter and Trisha (my running partner) on the weekends. So Saturday we ventured out to our beloved "long route". Trisha and I did small spurts of jogs while Mark and Peter walked while pushing the stroller. It worked out great! Except that it was hard and I was a little sore the next day.

Not sure how to fit workouts in during the week other than walks when it's not raining and the conditions with Millie are good. But I figure the worst case scenario we can walk most of the half marathon. The point is to get out there again! Peter and Mark are planning to walk it as well and we enjoyed our workout together on Saturday!

After our walk we all went out for breakfast than back to Peter and Trisha's for the guys to play xbox and for us all to hangout for a bit. It's nice to fit Millie into pieces of our life that we've had to take a break from lately.

Millie smiling and talking.

For several days this week we've tried a new schedule with Millie. Well, not so much of a schedule just a better "flow" for the days. It was one I read about before she was born but it didn't seem to work until now. She doesn't follow it completely, but pretty close. It's a 2-3 hour pattern of eating, staying awake and then sleeping (in that order). Although she throws some extra sleeps in there and has a long nap in the early afternoon. But I have to say, it's nice to sort of know what should be happening next. I watch for her signals and what's going on and roll with it. But it's only been a couple days so far. We've also tried putting her to bed earlier. Before we just put her to bed when she fell asleep at a time that worked for us but with this new flow we put her to bed during her sleep time around 8ish. We are trying to do about the same thing every night so she'll be familiar with the routine and know what time it is, time for bed! She'll wake up after only a couple hours and I'll feed her again and then we take turns staying up to rock her to sleep, when she'll sleep for her 3-4 hour time block.

Millie isn't doing any kind of sleeping through the night. She normally has a good 3 or 4 hour sleep but is otherwise up every 2 hours. I still haven't figured out how to put her back to sleep during the night if she doesn't do it automatically while eating. It's hit and miss for her to fall asleep on her own if I put her down when she isn't quite asleep. It's kind of amazing how you can go to bed early, get up kind of late, and still not feel like you sleep enough! Of course, being up multiple times a night for various lengths of time might be why ;)

This picture doesn't have anything to do with the schedule, I just think it's cute ;)

Life with Millie

2010-01-13T13:37:00.000-08:00

Millie certainly keeps us on our toes!! We came back from 1.5 weeks in Whidbey with Mark's family feeling pretty confident about our parenting abilities. So much time with extra hands will do that to you! She also did great on the drive sleeping almost the entire time and when she wasn't sleeping she contentedly looked around... it helped that I sat in the back seat with her when she wasn't sleeping.

However, the first night we were home, Millie cried for over 2 hours! We tried everything we thought could help and nothing worked so we just took turns holding her and trying to comfort her and she eventually settled down.

That Monday was a little hard as I transitioned into being home alone with her again. However, some breaks hanging out at Barb's helped and a few activities that week.

Here we are snuggling ;)

Millie has started smiling in the past week! It's SO cute!! She smiles all the time when you talk to her and melts our hearts like butter. There is nothing that makes getting up in the middle of the night more worth it than a smiling baby.

Millie had also started talking to us! She makes several different sounds and moves her face and looks at you so intently we are convinced she thinks she is actually telling us things. It's adorable!!

And who could resist these eyes?

My Birthday, New Year's and other pics

2010-01-12T13:21:00.001-08:00

My 29th birthday was 12/30. Mark and I decided to do something we pretty much never do while visiting his parents... actually leave the house ;) Other than our short trip to the mall before Christmas and our drive to Whidbey, we had our first family outing and did a short walk and lunch at a little bistro in Old Town Oak Harbor. It was a small adventure, but we felt good about getting out with the baby.

That night Jean made me a special meal and I opened some nice gifts from everyone. Mark's gift for me was a little late and I didn't get it until we got home, a necklace with charms on it with all our names on it, SO fun!!

It was a wonderful birthday!

This is us at lunch. Other than a small snack, Millie slept through almost all of it ;)

We had a small misunderstanding with our New Year's celebration. Being a new mom, I get tired early and the 31st was no exception. I went to bed at 10pm and had Mark promise to wake me at 11:45. So I headed to bed. The next thing I knew it was after 1am and Mark was bringing me little Millie to feed her. Umm... what happened to 11:45?

Apparently Mark woke me but I was SO tired that I quickly fell back asleep and didn't realize that when he said "happy new year" it was still only 11:45 and not 1am like I thought. I completely forgot he had woken me up earlier until the morning when he jogged my memory and thought he decided to let me sleep. I had really wanted to get up and celebrate the new year with a kiss and he really wanted me to get up.

So... we missed our New Year's kiss and family picture. Here's the substitute picture, taken the morning of the 1st.

Millie and her cousin's, Rian and Tegan.

Millie, wearing the first outfit Mark and I bought for her. It was still a little big, but SUPER cute!!

Mark and Millie right before bath time.

Things I love about being Millie's Mom

2010-01-01T14:16:00.000-08:00

- I love how Millie lets out these little frustrated waaa's as she tries to communicate something. It normally starts with her grunting and making little noises and then she cries. But she doesn't all out scream, she gives you a few warnings first. And of course her arms and legs start moving more and more as she gets worked up.

- I love how she pumps her little leg (normally just one) when she is getting hungry and right before she gets fed.

- I love how she seems to want to push anything out while you are changing her. She practically smiles as she catches you off guard with a little pee and/or poo or something that doesn't come until you've put on the clean diaper. Which frequently ends with changing her clothes, her changing pad cover or at the very least the new diaper.

- I love how she smiles at me sometimes and occasionally for no apparent reason. They are few and far between but do amazing things to my soft squishy heart.

- I love how Millie doesn't like to take her pacifier even though she likes it after a while. We think she's going to be a little like me in that she won't like something until she understands the purpose, poor kid (or poor us!). At the very least she'll make a nasty face (like she's eaten something she doesn't like) and try and spit it out. However, it's better than the alternative where she nurses 24/7.

- I love how she just lays there while you change her and seems to enjoy a little naked time. Unless you are taking too long than she'll start to make those frustrated sounds.

- I love when I'm changing her and she stretches out her super cute little baby legs! I'm not sure why but that movement is the most adorable thing without pants on!!

- I love how I'm getting to know things about her. How she's been getting fussy when she's tired and you just have to hold and bounce and sway and pat and try and hold the pacifier in her mouth until she suddenly nods off. Sometimes she'll go completely out or she'll take 30 minutes of waking and then falling back asleep before she's really out.

- And call me crazy but I also love how Millie always spits up when I'm not prepared with a cloth. And how I've gotten blasted 3-4 times on the same shirt in one day and how it's even gone down my shirt and/or unnoticed as I've gone about my day.

- I love how when she stretches she curls up her legs, sticks her little butt out, arches her back, scrunches her face, and bends one arm while putting the other straight out like she's trying to fly.

- I love how Millie makes all kinds of noises. She grunts ALL the time like she's constantly trying to push out a poo. She squeaks and groans and whimpers and many other sounds we don't understand why she makes, but we think are the cutest!

- I love how she curls up on her daddy's chest once or twice a day to sleep. It's familiar, comforting and melts my heart.

- I love how her daddy takes SUCH good care of her!! He's constantly willing to take her at night, change and dress her whenever he is around, and take her while I get a little break. He's not afraid of her cries or her fussiness and isn't quick to hand her to me if she gets like that. And I especially love how no matter what she is doing he keeps saying how cute she is and how in love with her he is and how all the things I've just mentioned, he loves too. And we think it's the funniest thing ever how she likes to surprise you during her diaper changing sessions. Seems fitting that we'd get a kid who does those types of things ;) He's an AMAZING Dad!!

I think I love everything about my daughter and being a mom. There are so many little things that I delight in and am thankful for! I'm still scared and uncertain about pretty much everything we are doing but when I look at her face and her many different changing expressions, I just smile and can't believe what a blessing we have in our little Millie. So I say lots of prayers, take it one day at a time and look forward to each phase passing and the new phases coming while trying to enjoy the moment!

29 years and counting

2009-12-30T21:11:00.000-08:00

I'm laying on the bed in Mark's room at his parent's house in Whidbey Island. I'm on my stomach, which is still fun because for 8 months or so, I couldn't. I just finished watching Julie & Julia while rocking a fussy baby to sleep. Today included an early gift from my wonderful husband of getting up with Millie as needed last night so I could sleep. SO wonderful!! Also only the 2nd outing with my little family to a local Bistro where we enjoyed a casual lunch and jumped our first "feeding in public" hurdle with Millie. Tons of wonderful well wishes from friends and family. And of course a fantastic dinner and cake from Mark's family, as well as some wonderful gifts! All in all, a very fun birthday.

Today I couldn't help thinking back on last year's birthday. I have a terrible memory but remember clearly some moments from last December 30th. We were staying at my brother's place in Montana enjoying a lazy New Year's which included movies, video games, (for me) reading the Twilight series, sleeping in late and lots of food. For my birthday my brother made breakfast burritos and we later celebrated that night with dinner and gifts at my parent's house. But that afternoon I remember thinking how I was a little sad because the one thing I truly wanted, I didn't get... a baby. Okay, it sounds cheesy as I write it, but it's really true. By that point we had been trying for 5 months and nothing was happening and I was SO bummed and beginning to wonder if something was wrong and if it would ever happen but desperately trying to trust God.

So this year even though there wasn't an extravagant party or something "big", I found myself constantly being thankful that this year we are also celebrating the birth of our little Millie, who is now 1 month old!! I'm thankful that God had a plan for our family to include her and that it didn't take more time and effort than it did (because if you think about it, then we wouldn't have had Millie, it would have been a different baby and I wouldn't trade this one for the world!!)

It's funny how life just hasn't turned out nearly like what I imagined. It contains many of the pieces I had hoped for but not at all in the timing I would have wanted them. But it's true (and I need to remember this later) that it really is "better" this way. God's design and timing for our lives, no matter how much I doubt it, truly is better. Of course, I can say that easily now because I have everything I want... a wonderful handsome husband, a beautiful baby girl, a cute little condo, vehicles that get us where we need to go, just enough money to live on, and loving families that are eager to love on and meet our new daughter.

Now I'm off to get ready for bed and squeeze in an hour or so of sleep before the little one wakes up again. Maybe I'll get lucky and this will be a 3-4 hour sleeping time instead of just a 2 hour. And if I'm REALLY lucky, she'll go right back to sleep after she eats next and stay asleep, even after I lay her down in her bassinet.

And if there is any part of this that doesn't make sense, words left out, or the wrong word anywhere, it's because I'm so tired I can hardly keep my eyes open!!

Happy 29th year to me and I'm looking forward to seeing what I'll be reflecting back on when I celebrate my 30th!!

Christmas in Whidbey with the Peeples

2009-12-27T20:05:00.000-08:00

Millie did PERFECT on the drive up to Whidbey. It probably helped that she didn't go to sleep until 4am the night before. But she slept the entire 5 hour drive with one stop to eat. I was shocked and pleased!

Me and Millie on Christmas Eve morning.

Millie after her bath in her Christmas Eve dress.

Family picture

Me and my precious daughter! By the way, her feet don't really fit into those shoes. Her outfit was really cute!! It was mixed/matched from lots of people. I bought the dress but got the tights from my friend Adri, the shoes from Allison McKenney (I'm pretty sure), and the sweater was handmade by Grandma Jean. She pooped through most of those layers by the end of the night, but not until after the service ;)

Daddy and daughter.

Another family pic. Not sure what Millie is doing in this shot, but who knows what she is doing most of the time ;)

Millie's first Christmas morning. She stayed up late the night before so slept through the entire morning. Her stocking is the same size as her ;)

This is her cute little Christmas outfit.

Millie with Grandma Jean.

Troubles with blogging

2009-12-19T13:35:00.000-08:00

I have 2 challenges when it comes to blogging... and why I don't get a ton of pictures posted.

1) To save money, we down-graded our Internet a few weeks ago so it's MUCH slower than before. It takes a good 10 minutes to load 6 pictures and even then only 3 of them tend to load anyway. So it's a frustrating experience... after Christmas I might try another Internet option to see if that's better, but switching stuff like that is always quite the process!

2) My computer is old and therefore slow itself. So in addition to the Internet being slow, my computer is slow when it comes to playing with pics. My process for loading pics is reasonable but then I have to import them into a different location to make sure I keep everything together. So it's not simply plugging in the camera and then popping a few online.

Because of these reasons and wanting to spend more of my download time on loading pictures to the site where I can print them from, I've been trying to get facebook mostly current with pics since that gets more traffic than my blog. So if you are on facebook and want to keep up more with pics, please find me on there and check regularly for current pictures of our beautiful daughter and little family.

Little things about little Millie

2009-12-15T09:48:00.001-08:00

Millie's 2 week stats: 8lbs 11oz and 22in long, everything perfect!

I thought I'd share a few fun things about Millie and how she spends her days:

- Millie has gotten rather squeaky in the past few days. She squeaks and makes little noises while she sleeps and also while she's awake. It's cute.

- When her dad is home, he changes and dresses her as needed. However, she likes to poo and/or pee while being changed by her daddy... it's cute ;) Except, anyone know how to get mustang colored poo out of a little white sleeper?

- Millie loves her hands. Since she was born she's liked to suck on them, flail them around, and pull them out of the tightest swaddle, so we don't normally wrap them up or cover them.

- Speaking of her hands, when she's eating she either holds her hands or puts them in little fists. That's cute too!

- Millie has gone out with me for several "outings" so far, the Christmas concert at church on Sunday night and out to lunch with Barb after a pediatrician appointment yesterday. Both of which she slept through completely! Which was nice, but didn't give her momma much practice at taking her out. But we have 2 more outings planned this week so we'll see how those go.

- While she sleeps, little Millie has a strange "twitch". It's almost more of a jerking that she does with her limbs and sometimes even her head. It sometimes gets bad enough that it almost wakes her up. We've been assured that it's nothing to worry about but you can't help but feel bad for her when it's happening.

- In the past few days she's also started letting out some little cries in her sleep. Her Dr said it's when she transitions to different "levels" within the REM sleep cycle. It used to be just one little cry and now it's gotten to be 3 or 4. It doesn't wake her up but makes you want to comfort her.

- Also while she sleeps (remember she spends most of her days sleeping right now) her preferred position is with her head slightly back and her little mouth open. During her first week I was feeding her in our bed one night and she had fallen asleep in this position over my left arm and I looked over to my left and saw her daddy in the exact same position... apparently she sleeps just like her dad ;)

- Millie is spending longer and longer periods of awake time on the floor, just kicking and waving her arms. She also likes to stare at some strange things, like the little square Ikea mirrors above our fireplace. I think it's the contrast between the dark wood on the white walls (yes, we still have white walls).

- Speaking of time on the floor, we haven't done much "tummy time" yet because she anything near her face she thinks is something to eat so she roots around the blanket until she makes herself frustrated... so tummy time hasn't been very successful so far.

- While being changed and dressed, Millie rarely cries. Not sure what she likes about the experience but she just lays there and moves her arms and lets and stares at things. She gets a little desperate when completely undressed but otherwise just hangs out while we're dressing and changing her. She'll start to cry if it takes too long though.

- Millie is kind of a social kid so far and does better when she's in the same room with people or being held but not so much when she's all alone. Strangely, she wakes up pretty quickly when she's in a room by herself.

- So far, Millie has a love/hate relationship with her car seat. To be honest, she hasn't spent much time in there. We didn't go anywhere between Monday and Thursday morning last week. She either screams off and on (although I think a couple of those times were because she was hungry and we were trying to make it home) and then there was yesterday... she fell asleep and never made a sound. I'm hoping she's getting more used to it. She'll need to before our 300 mile drive to Whidbey next week for Christmas.

- Millie doesn't actually cry too often. If her momma takes too long to feed her she lets out some frustrated cries or gets upset if it takes too long to change/dress her and the newness of the car, but otherwise she just doesn't cry very often. When she wakes up she spends anywhere from 3-15 minutes making noises and moving around before she wants to let you know she's waited long enough for some attention.

Speaking of which, she's letting me know she's ready for some attention so I have to go. Will post more pictures later. Sometimes a few minutes online is as good as I can manage each day. The slowness of my computer doesn't promote lots of pic posting time!

Life with baby

2009-12-11T10:54:00.000-08:00

Millie will be 2 weeks old tomorrow. Time sure has gone by fast!! She is SO cute and likes to eat. I've had 3 days alone with her that went pretty well. We have even gotten into a little routine for 2 of those days. Although I can't imagine trying to care for a newborn with other kids!! I suppose when it's your first time it's all so new...

Mark has done a great job of picking up some extra tasks around the house and we're getting some meals this week, which will be SO helpful!! I can't imagine trying to cook when afternoons seem to be Millie's fussy time. And grocery shop... that seems extremely intimidating to me right now. Next week we have a few things we are going to try and venture out to. Will be nice to get out a little and try my hand at taking her places. She's not too consistent yet though so should be interesting.

Here are more pics of our little Millie.

Millie, asleep, with Daddy. He loves his precious little girl!

We managed to catch a smile while she was sleeping. It's SO cute!! I love her little arm up. She loves moving her hands and arms around and trying to eat her hands.

Millie with Grandma, around 4 days told.

Beautiful baby face!

Floor time. I've tried "tummy time" but she just likes to eat the blanket ;)

1 week old. Jerry, Andrea and family brought us dinner and hung out for a bit.

She likes the bath! Look at that contented face. SO cute!!

Baby is here!!

2009-12-03T10:36:00.001-08:00

Millie Elizabeth Peeples

Born Sunday 11/29/09 @ 3:56pm

8lb 7oz and 21in long

Here are some pictures. I left off the one where they put her on me right after her birth. I have a pained and confused look on my face in that one. It doesn't reflect the pure joy and delight I actually felt.

The labor and delivery was scary, short, painful, and weird. Scary in that I wasn't sure what to expect as the process went on and surprised that it was eventually all over with. I had no idea what I was doing and just did what they told me. I LOVED the drugs (don't judge) and made it reasonably far before getting them and am SOOO glad I did!! But also appreciated the experience before I got them.

The entire labor was only 9 hours long, including an hour of pushing. Wonderfully fast!! It didn't feel fast at the time but I'm glad it was what it was. We weren't allowed to have more than 2 visitors in the hospital at one time (originally had been told 2 people total), so in addition to my mom and Mark, my dad and Barb were able to pop in during our short hospital stay. We were admitted at midnight on Sunday morning, had the baby by 4pm, were moved to recovery by 8pm, and left the hospital at 4:30pm on Monday. Since being home we've had an appointment each morning and just today are able to enjoy a day at home.

We're SOOO in love with our little one!! Nights are rough, but somehow I don't really care when I look into that perfect little face!! I'm exceptionally grateful for Jean (Mark's mom) who has come to stay with us for the week. She takes care of everything so all I have to do is feed my child and take care of myself. Although just those 2 things are surprisingly challenging!! Hence the reason it has taken me so long to get this posted.

Without further delay, pictures!!

She sleeps like her dad ;) Don't worry, she didn't actually sleep here, I just set her down for a sec and couldn't help capturing the moment.

Millie's daddy LOVES his daughter!! Especially just holding her while she sleeps. Mark has been GREAT at taking his night time shifts and does almost all her changes and getting her dressed this week. We're bummed he goes back to work tomorrow.

I realized in these pictures that I'm not smiling as big as my heart feels. Not sure why... still recovering?

This has been my day-time location for the past 2 days. Everything I need is on the little table next to the couch, I have pillows, and limit my trips up and down the stairs. It's been quite cozy!

Life in the waiting lane

2009-11-24T14:33:00.001-08:00

Instead of the fast lane... get it? Hah! Okay, that was fairly pathetic.

A day in the life of a woman awaiting an induction (not working and it's our first kid):

6:30 get up and go to the gym with mom and Barb

8:00 swing by the store for bread

8:15 come home and help husband get lunch and breakfast and eat breakfast myself

8:45 catch up on emails and blogs online while enjoying a little morning tv

11:00 get dressed and take a nap

12:30 get up and eat lunch, yummy leftover homemade mac & cheese, kill time on the couch and watch part of a movie

2:30 head to Starbucks for time with God and reading a book on how to care for our child when she comes out

4:40 stop by the store for ice cream to go with dessert

5:00 come home and make cheeseball, crochet and visit with mom until dinner

7:30 eat dinner with the family

8:00 a little veg time and crocheting in front of the tv with the fam

This morning we had a Dr appointment (nothing new, still on track for Sunday's induction), I took another nap, ate lunch, more time on the computer, etc. Mostly a repeat of yesterday. Although I am somewhat proud of myself for not just sitting on the couch watching soaps and eating bon bons. After my current time online I plan to breakout the scrapbooking. I'm practically caught up!

Tomorrow I'm enjoying a pedicure with mom and Barb, then dinner with family at Cheesecake Factory before the Thanksgiving Eve RESCUE concert at Sunset. I originally thought I'd have a new baby and wouldn't be up for going to the concert so am excited I can go! (Although a little bummed at the circumstances.) Thursday we're having a low key Thanksgiving day at Barb's with just the 5 of us. Friday is the family excursion downtown for the parade, then hanging out at Barb's. Saturday dad flys out and we head to the hospital right before midnight. Weird to think that in a week from today I'll be home with a new baby!!

Right now I feel pretty good about things. Excited to have a baby and feel like I've had so much drama wrapped up in waiting for her to show that bringing her home almost seems anti-climactic. Not in the "she's not a big deal" way but more in the "having it finally happen may not be as dramatic as it has been so far, more of a relief" kind of way. Mom agreed that feeling like some of the drama is past might help ease the transition. Either way, I'm taking it one day at a time. Having fun with the parents, enjoying lots of downtown at home, taking naps, and relishing the last few days with my husband before the 2 of us become 3. He's really such a wonderful and amazing man. I can't wait to journey with him down this new path. I can't imagine doing such a scary thing with anyone else! I love him like mad crazy and love being around him as much as possible. He makes me smile and laugh ;)

Weekly pregnant pic... yes, I'm still pregnant

2009-11-22T17:35:00.000-08:00

40 weeks and 1 days pregnant

I'm a day early on the Monday pregnant pic thing that I've done for the past 2 weeks, but whatever. The point being... I'm STILL pregnant!! I'm pretty sure I didn't think I would make it this far.

The parents are now both in town, which is fun. Poor dad leaves before our scheduled induction on Sunday (1 week from today) so he may have to come back later to meet his grandchild. But we should have fun this week with Thanksgiving and I'm officially on maternity leave, which I love so far!!

I'm starting to attend things I thought I wouldn't be going to. The first one being church this morning. Then the Thanksgiving Eve concert on Wednesday night, the downtown parade with family the day after Thanksgiving... and I think that's about it. I was originally thinking of avoiding all those activities but then adjusted to the idea and although I'll probably face all kinds of comments about, "when is this baby coming?", I'll grin and bear it. I try to refrain from sarcastic responses, a little. Today when someone asked, my response was something like, "wouldn't I like to know". That's not too sarcastic, right? I do find it somewhat amusing when strangers ask when I'm due and I now say "yesterday".

Currently we (my parents, Mark, Barb, and myself) are doing $5 bets on what day we think the baby will arrive. I'm playing it safe with Sunday, the day the Dr scheduled our induction. I would be more than happy to loose the bet, although $25 would be nice, but not worth the extra time if this child decided to arrive before then. Although I'm now expecting to have a 8 to 9 lb baby.

Speaking of our scheduled induction, the Dr didn't give us much of a choice at our appointment last Wednesday. I hadn't "progressed" any more than previously and he went ahead and scheduled it for 8 days after our due date, on a day he was working and late enough that they wouldn't end up sending me home if things didn't "work". So either way next Sunday/Monday we'll have our baby.

Thanks for those of you who haven't shared suggestions on how to bring labor on. I'm trying a few things but assume that God will bring this child when He's ready no matter what we're trying.

Monday pregnant pic day

2009-11-16T19:08:00.000-08:00

Apparently Monday is pregnant picture day. Lordwilling one day it will be new baby picture day, every day!!

The coat I'm wearing makes me think of that Chris Farley skit where he would wear a too-small jacket and sing, "fat man in a little coat". This is, obviously, a non-maternity coat.

Mom is here, which is super fun!! Came home from work today to dinner in the crockpot, cake in the oven, and the house warm freshly picked up and smelling good. I could really get used to having dinner ready for me every night!!

There is still no indication that this child is going to come any time soon. She's due on Saturday. We're talking with the Dr at Wednesday's appointment about plan B. Although we're still on the fence about what plan B should be.

In the mean time, I'm plowing through my last week of work. Which I'm glad about since my back doesn't want to spend more than 5 minutes sitting comfortably in my work chair. It's too weird that it's my last week of work that reality hasn't set in!!

Pregnant pic

2009-11-09T19:30:00.001-08:00

The nursery is completely ready. I have decided to give up on cleaning. My mom is coming out this week and is staying until after Thanksgiving (SUPER excited about this!!). And I can only think of a few ways in which I could be more uncomfortable. I told Mark tonight on the drive home that the reality of what is about to happen to us completely escapes me. So right now I'm focusing on the excitement of not having a child using up all my resources. And planning a few fun activities (New Moon ;) for next weekend in case this child has decided to stay in past her due date. I think I get a little too anxious about having her out when I think about how I get my very own baby in a few short days/weeks ;)

Here I am, 38 weeks and 2 days.

Can you see the stretch marks on the bottom half of my belly? They are quite nice. Looks like someone clawed me down there. And of course, they are made worse by the excessive itchiness.

Life and baby prep and guesses on due date

2009-10-31T15:59:00.000-07:00

On the subject of life, Mark and I got up just after 7 this morning, threw some clothes on, grabbed some food and headed out to get in line for swine flu shots. Since our baby isn't here yet, Mark wasn't allowed to get one (they were doing priority people only) and I managed to score the last shot the people giving them had. Relieved to have that done although the baby may not come before it actually starts working in my system so going to ask the Dr how this will all work. The pic below is Mark and I in line.

Regarding baby prep, my mom has been here for a few days and has helped me make AMAZING progress on getting the final details in place and all our wonderfully pink gifts put away. Although we had the furniture in place, we still had to figure out where all the little things were going to go and mom has been great! She's good at organizing and just sort of took over. Especially after yesterday's shopping trip when I was too tired to do anything other than sit on the couch. As we were out yesterday from around 10 until nearly 4, Mom and Barb kept laughing at me as I said things like, "my back hurts and I don't know why." Because apparently the reason "why" was very obvious to them.

We still have a few small things left to do, but for the most part we're ready!! At least as ready as you can be to completely change your life from what you've known for the past 2 years. It's exciting and scary!!

I want to find out what people are guessing for when the baby will come. We're due on the 21st (3 weeks from today) and the Doc says he's estimating she'll probably be early and not late. So far mom is guessing the 18th. No one else has made a guess yet. Anyone else want to weigh in??

I'm HUGE!!

2009-10-26T21:43:00.000-07:00

Okay, this is a TERRIBLE picture of me, but as a profile shot... I can't believe how HUGE I am!!! The baby is all in front. Currently she likes to push out a lot, I keep trying to tell her that won't give her any more room, but she doesn't see to be figuring that out. And she pushes a leg (assuming it's a leg) out on my right side all the time. We sometimes like to pick on her and push back until she moves a little ;) I'm also enjoying her periodic hiccups. She just recently started to get them and frequently gets them a little while after I eat lunch or dinner.

Baby shower

2009-10-26T20:01:00.000-07:00

Yesterday Barb and Sharon Mulder threw me a baby shower for my Sunset family. I work there, do ministry there, and have been attending for almost 7 years so it was quite the crowd! My friends are very generous and other than having to take a ton of pee breaks and getting sleepy, it was a wonderful afternoon!!

Me and Rose. She is the wife of a guy I work with and I got to know her at Gift last week. She's awesome and is learning maternity massage... I'm taking advantage on Thursday ;)

Me (36 weeks) and Barb. Thanks for the beautiful location, yummy food, and wonderful party!!

Jilly Gosset, know her from my job as admin. She's an awesome woman!

Little Nike's from my friend Jenna who I've been hanging out with since she was a Junior in HS. She's now graduated from college and is a career woman.

Rose picked out an outfit that was the hit of the party. SUPER cute!!

From L to R, Janet, Julie, Bethany and Rose. Janet is my boss and gotten to be a good friend. Julie start off as Barb's friend and is now mine as well, she's also offered her arms to hold the baby as needed. Bethany is the wife of another guy I work with and a good friend. And Rose, again ;)

These are just a few of the 20-25 people who were able to come. Barb's place was quite crowded. It was fun to see friends from so many different circles, our realtor, friends of Barb's, former co-workers, current co-workers, friends from student ministry, and all some how associated with Sunset. My mom was even able to come!! She's in town for a work thing and managed to get away for a few hours to join the party.

This was our second/last shower. So now I'll be spending the weekend with my mom trying to finalize the last few purchases and then plan to organize all our wonderful new clothes and accessories in the nursery so we're all ready to go!

At our appointment last Wednesday the Dr said he thinks the baby should be more early than late, which is exciting! So I'm hoping all these early plans will be necessary ;)

Jared's visit

2009-10-26T19:53:00.000-07:00

Last Friday (the week before last), Jared flew through Portland for a short 12 hour layover on his way to Denver with our uncle Jerry for the marathon. We had dinner at Barb's, watched a little ol' skool Tremors and then back to our place to bed and up early to meet up with Jerry on the way to the airport. It was a fun quick stop!

Mark's 31st birthday

2009-10-17T19:37:00.000-07:00

Last Friday (10/9) my super wonderful husband celebrated his 31st birthday. Well, he worked that day, but we celebrated a little in the morning and evening.

Here is Mark enjoying his birthday breakfast. I made it nearly the way he wanted. But he was gracious about my minor mistake and we had a fun slow morning anyway.

We spent our evening in the usual way, dinner and a little tv. I made a special dinner that we ate at the table instead of in front of the tv (we realize this habit will change soon). Here he is opening up his card and gifts. It was a modest year in the gift department.

On Saturday we had a yummy breakfast at Elmer's and then headed to the beach to use up a free hotel night we won from a friend. Thanks again Sara! Our hotel was at Lincoln City and we got there in time to wander around town a bit before we checked in. We first killed time at the Outlet malls, but didn't hardly buy anything. And then grabbed food at a little hut and took in a bit of the kite festival. This is me, 34 weeks. I bought this non-maternity white fleece at Old Navy not long ago. It's currently my only coat that fits!

Mark's coat was one of his birthday presents. He really liked it, which I was thrilled about!

We opted for a fish dinner since we were at the beach and ended up at a pretty cool place.

All in all, it was a really fun weekend! We didn't do too much but enjoyed our last little solo get away for a while. Will be fun see how we celebrate Mark's birthday next year. Life will sure be different!!

Advice and Random thoughts/feelings

2009-10-14T20:58:00.000-07:00

First, I have to say THANK YOU to everyone who offered great preparation advice for our coming baby birth!! I plan to consult back to the notes in a few weeks when I'm putting all the final touches and pieces into place.

So far (although I know that posting this is just asking for feedback, but please be gentle) my biggest concerns are breastfeeding. We do plan to breastfeed our child but have heard stories of easy to nearly impossible and everything in between, I just have no idea what to expect or think of this element of parenting. But I guess there isn't much I can do except see how our little one does.

I'm excited to be uncomfortable enough that I'm wanting our kid out (no matter what that means) instead of in for too much longer. Up until a couple weeks ago labor/delivery freaked me out so badly that I figured she'd be okay staying in place for as long as possible. However, now that I can't sleep for very long between waking and peeing, can't sit in my desk chair comfortably, sit anywhere else comfortably for that matter, walk without getting winded, have more than an hour between itchy sessions (I was unofficially diagnosed with PUPPPs), or fit into more than a half dozen clothes in my closet, I'm ready to get this birthing show on the road! However, I have one question... did any of you "practice" breathing or other birthing techniques before the arrival of your little ones? Our birthing class made that suggestion and I have yet to do it. Although I wouldn't approach a marathon without training so I can see how it might be beneficial, I just keep forgetting!

I've started working through one of the books suggested to me (although to keep from any hard feelings or further suggestions, I'll refrain from mentioning which book that is) but so far I've really appreciated the content of the first 2 chapters! And since you aren't sure if it's your book or not, THANK YOU for the suggestion!!

I'm SUPER excited that my mom is coming out next week for my last baby shower!! She has work stuff for a couple days and then I'm dragging her along to help me do any final shopping and setting up of the nursery so that when the baby arrives, everything will be ready. It's been a bummer to live at a distance from your mom during this stage of life, but we're working things out and I'm excited she'll be here to help with the final touches, since she's been-there-done-that and I obviously haven't. She'll be out one more time before the baby comes so we're praying for an early arrival so she can justify staying instead of going home after her last work trip. It would only be one week away from our due date so seems possible ;) And we found out that mom has to make another trip out for work in December so she'll get more face time with the baby.

I'll try and post more pictures soon. But you aren't missing much. I feel huge. Sometimes I pass a mirror and while approaching it, think I'm looking pretty good today and then my huge belly enters the shot and I'm nearly overwhelmed with how huge I am!! Although it's partly perception. I'm sure I'm not as big as some women are at this stage, but I feel huge! And feelings frequently trump reality.

Last little update, I've started attending MOMs group at church. It meets every other Thursday morning. So far I've gone to 2 meetings and will miss tomorrow's but am really enjoying it!! I feel like it's a great way to re-center on God, which I appreciate. This is another discussion for another day but I feel like I was so close to God when single and miss that desperate longing that I just don't have (as much of) with a happy marriage and anticipation of a baby on the way. But I kind of enjoy the challenge of learning where God is in my new phase of life and what that looks like for our relationship. Life is just so different from that singleness I knew so well.

The Tension

2009-10-14T20:49:00.000-07:00

It seems that every stage of life has a bit of tension. When I was single there was the constant tension of "when will it happen?" Of wanting to learn to be content in the moment while being open to the future. After Mark and I started dating there was a tension about whether or not we'd get married. Then the tension of what would married life be like. Next was the tension about when do we have kids. Then, when will we actually get pregnant. And now, the tension of living in the soon-but-not-yet world. It definitely reminds me of being engaged and wondering how I'd feel on our wedding day and how our first few days, weeks, months and years of being married would be like. Easy? Hard?

I'm not sure if other people feel the tension so much. I always struggle with wanting to move on to the next thing. I know it's going to happen, so lets just get there and get it started! Of course, life generally doesn't function on my ideal (a bit too fast) time frame.

In some ways, the tension is always the same and is always present. It's not between me and other people. It's between 'now' and 'tomorrow'. My desire to move on to 'tomorrow' when I need to learn the be content and enjoy 'now'. How long did I desire to be in this stage and tension of life when we weren't getting pregnant all those months? Now I'm here and nearly wishing it all away. Even in the early stages of pregnancy when I wanted so badly to be showing and for the world to be able to tell we're expecting a little bundle of joy and now it's obvious and I'm wishing it to be gone as soon as is safely possible.

So right now we're (mostly me) in the middle of the tension between enjoying the way things have been for the past 2 years, but excited for what the next phase of our life with a baby will hold. When will she come? How will I feel on that day? What will the first few days, weeks, months, and years be like? Will it be easy or hard?

Baby preparations - advice!

2009-10-06T19:11:00.000-07:00

I'm trying not to feel guilty about the fact that my blog/life revolves around baby related things these days. It's just where my life is at and I'm not sure why I think you might anticipate reading something else.

We are 33.5 weeks into the 40 of our pregnancy and as a planner, I'm starting to think through the final preparations I need to be making. Our last birthing class is this week and my last baby shower is in 2.5 weeks and I'd like to be making my final purchases pretty quickly after that time.

With that in mind, can all you experienced mothers (or those who have been close to an experienced mother) share the top 5 baby and mommy things I should have on-hand for the first few weeks/months? You can only anticipate so much when you've never done this before.

You can either include your responses as a comment or email me markcarrie.peeples at gmail.com. Please don't be shy or try and make it short. The MORE THE BETTER! And feel free to pass this on to friends who might have some good suggestions.

Thanks!!

Baby Shower!

2009-09-19T22:58:00.001-07:00

My good friend Trisha threw me a baby shower last night! We invited mostly my family and close friends. It was really fun!!

By the way, Barb is throwing me another shower for my Sunset family, so if you are part of that group, you'll be getting an evite in the coming weeks ;)

Trisha did an amazing job on food and decorations!! Barb and I went out with Jenna to get birthday (our gift to Jenna from back in May) celebration pedicures and by the time I got home my place had been transformed into baby shower land!

Everyone was SO generous and I couldn't believe all the wonderful gifts we received!! It's a relief to be getting some of the baby accessories we've been needing.

Mark's Mom (who wasn't able to make it) knit this BEAUTIFUL white baby sweater! It's SUPER cute!! When I started opening the gifts I almost wanted to cry because of how real it was all feeling. I've wanted this for so long and can't believe it's happening!!

Me with my cake. Trisha made the invitations and the cake, which looked like each other.

Some of my aunts and cousins who came up from Dallas and Salem. They were a little late due to traffic, but managed to stay for a bit. My cousin Margaret (on my left) is due 3 to 4 weeks before me and is looking great!

My good friend Stacey MADE me and the baby quilts!! I LOVE them!!

Barb, me (31 weeks) and Trisha at the end of the night. It was a really fun night!!

The Nursery

2009-09-19T22:31:00.000-07:00

It's finished!! Well, mostly ;) But other than moving in all the accessories we have yet to acquire and the baby, it's pretty much ready to go.

Here's the view from the doorway, which is also the first thing you see when you go up the stairs. We have the baby's name on the wall but aren't trying to broadcast that quite yet ;)

We "splurged" on the crib and changing table. I shopped around online a TON and debated on going cheaper or not. I couldn't find anything on craigslist and found a few good deals online but by the time I was ready to buy them, they weren't on sale any more. Since we had been putting some money aside we decided that we could get what we really wanted. Although I shopped for the best deal and feel like I got one! As well as 10% off and free shipping and handling. They are both an espresso colored wood. They aren't a matching set because I didn't like the crib that matched the changing table and the changing table that matched the crib, so got the 2 that I liked ;)

The bed is on the opposite wall as the crib. It's Mark's old college bed. I originally wanted to store it but decided to keep it and got a cheap duvet cover and pillow cases from Ikea.

The picture right above the bed (I don't have a full shot) is a fabric-covered bulletin board with a spray painted Goodwill frame I made for our guest room but it fit well in here. It has little pregnancy momentos pinned on it. We figure the bed will come in handy for naps, guests, and late night feedings ;)

A view of the window. The valance came with the bedding set and Mom made the curtains when she was here. We got the super cute lamp from Ikea, as well as the simple curtain rod.

We set out a few things on the changing table to display for now. Super cute!!

The bedding set we got for about $60 (+shipping) off ebay. I decided that we had registered for enough items that I really didn't want to have to worry about completing a bedding set. I think it's a knock off for a more expensive design. But it was a great deal! Came with the sheet, quilt, bumper, 2 pillows, a toy holder, 3 padded wall hangings, 2 valances, and the diaper holder. I shopped around a while for this before finalizing a decision and am really happy with it!!

We love our little nursery! It's pink, brown and lime green, and simple yet pretty. We didn't want to do any "permanent" pink to the walls or anything since we might try and squeeze another kid into the room eventually and you never know what the next one will be ;) But we can't wait to bring our little home to this little space!

Pregnant pictures and current thoughts

2009-09-13T17:32:00.001-07:00

It helps me that my mom doesn't live close by because I'm more motivated to take pictures ;)

29 weeks and 2 days.

I can't believe I keep flashing my belly to the world!

30 weeks exactly. I liked this outfit so wanted to take advantage of the moment and get pictures.

Close up.

Mark wanted a picture from my angle. So this is what I see when I look down. The brown dot on my tummy is a freckle. I can no longer see the tie on my pants and my belly button is on the verge of poking out, but not quite there.

So far pregnancy has been pretty easy for me. I know I'm fortunate! Other than the usual nausea, sensitive smell, and a few other things that ended around 14 weeks, it's been mostly smooth sailing.

I am at the point where I can't sleep on my back because it hurts and realized last night how I woke up probably 10-15 times to roll over to my other side (which isn't an easy thing any more), pee, or just move into a different position. I think that's probably the most difficult thing so far is that I wake up all the time and can't sleep very comfortably. I sleep well when I'm asleep (other than the crazy pregnant dreams), I just wake up a ton. I think some of these things are just preparation for after the baby comes ;) My only other minor complaint, other than how difficult its getting to move around (and I have 10 weeks to go!) and how sleepy I get, is the acid reflux I've been enjoying. But my Dr gave me permission the other day to take something stronger than Tums which has been working beautifully!

A few minutes ago I was looking through my scrapbook from 2007 and was envious of my former body. Although 2007 was the best shape my body has ever been in, thanks to marathon training and watching what I ate for our wedding, so it's not the best reflection of where I might be able to get back to after the baby comes. But I'm getting pretty excited about working on getting back into shape. I just hope I stay remotely motivated! I've been putting on a decent amount of weight so far. But some of the pregnant clothes I bought from July still fit the same except in the belly so I'm hoping that the weight gain isn't as much in the areas it's not supposed to be in. But I have stopped being surprised by the scale when I weigh in at the Dr office. And I still work out 1 to 2 days a week but am down to an easy 20 minute workout on the stair climber followed by a little weight training. And I do mean little! I don't think my workouts do much for me but it makes me feel like I'm lightly maintaining. I have aspirations of doing (doing = walking/running) a half marathon in late March of next year so will have to get right back to it after the baby comes!

Have I mentioned how I can't wear my wedding ring any more? My finger has been mildly irritated by my ring since I've been pregnant and by early July it was so bad I had to stop wearing it. So I took the opportunity to get it cleaned and buffed and now just wear it a couple days a week. The rest of the time I wear a small band. I really miss my ring!

On another note... oh man, I seriously forgot what I was going to say!!

Up until a couple weeks ago I was getting pretty anxious about the birthing process. However over the past few weeks it's turned more into excitement (not about the actual birth but having the baby out). I think I'm willing to go through this scary unknown process to welcome our child into the world and to get her out of my body ;)

I still like to enjoy moments of basking in the joy of actually being pregnant and about to have a child, which we've always wanted. We're certain we have no concept of how life will change after she comes, but are excited to adjust as needed. I know that some people never get to go through this process so I want to not take it for granted and be grateful for the opportunity to be pregnant, no matter what challenges come along with the process.

Before and after pictures, garage

2009-09-06T00:03:00.000-07:00

The garage is another space we wanted to work on when my parents were here. Our place is AWESOME but we have no drive-way (so aren't allowed to park in it) and have a TINY 1-car garage. We have comfortably fit the Mustang into the garage but were having trouble getting the van in without hitting side mirrors on the garbage can. In fact, we discovered that I had been mildly denting a strange place on the van with the garbage can (I was pretty annoyed when we discovered this). No matter how things fit/don't fit, the passenger still has to get out of the car before we pull into the garage, but we have that routine down pretty well.

Making our garage space more functional was pretty important. So here are the before and after pictures...

Amazingly, when this picture was taken our garage was already 25% more organized than it was before and you'll see on the far right, that Mark's bike was hung (which it didn't used to be).

This is the view from the front of the garage, you'll notice that we conveniently have parking spots right across from our garage. Although parking at our place is in high demand and we occasionally get lucky to get one of these.

Dad and Mark did a BRILLIANT job at organizing this space!! You'll notice in the last picture how Mark even got a work bench ("man space" is what they called it) out of the deal. Mark was pretty excited about that!

This is a better shot of the new shelving we now have. LOVE IT!! We're now proud to open our garage door when pulling in and out and show off our cool shelves and organized space! And it's fantastic to have a place for some of the things we needed to get out of the house.

2 Year Wedding Anniversary!!

2009-09-05T23:46:00.001-07:00

The picture is a little dark, but I think it's cute!!

We celebrated our 2 year wedding anniversary on Wednesday, but didn't "do" anything to celebrate until today (it's hard when the day lands in the middle of the week). We had decided to nearly recreate our first date and go to dinner and a movie downtown. So this afternoon we took the MAX downtown and had dinner at the Macaroni Grill and then went to see a movie at Pioneer Square. We killed time before the movie by doing one of our favorite things, people watching. It was especially interesting tonight because of some convention going on that required people to dress up in strange costumes. We think it was somehow connected to something nerd/gaming related (not that those things always go together). We had a wonderful night and can't believe it's already been 2 years!!

Other than being tighter than we might have imagined financially, we both feel like we've come a long way in 2 years. We have a house, are happier than we imagined possible, and are excitedly awaiting our first child.

By the way, this is me at 29 weeks pregnant. Wow! It's going by fast and slow at the same time. I'm getting pretty excited to welcome this little one into the world and am curious to see how it will feel to have her out. Seems hard to remember what it was like to NOT having a growing child in my body. I also wonder what it will be like to have a flat tummy again... except that I realized the other day that it may never be flat again. Minor details ;) But the excitement to have her out and around is outweighing the fear of the process to get there. At least until the time comes, then I'll probably be scared out of my mind ;)

Before and after pictures, living room

2009-09-05T23:24:00.000-07:00

A couple months ago we were blessed with a little cash related to property taxes and being in our house for a year. So we decided to fulfill something we'd been wanting to do and purchase some new living room furniture, namely, something that fit into our space a little better. We had previously been blessed with hand-me-down (free) furniture from friends and family. Although we were more than grateful to have these pieces up until now, we looking forward to getting something that fit with our life a little better. And since we hoped to not get anything else for a long time, especially since baby stuff will probably always trump other uses for cash in the future, we decided to get a new sofa. So here are the before and after pics...

By the time this picture was taken, we had already rearranged our sofa and chair. They were normally in the opposite positions. Either way, it was crowded. And of course, the ottoman was paired with the chair and coffee table with the sofa (unlike their positions featured in this picture).

Our sectional took a while after we purchased it to get to Portland and then delivered to our house. We gave our previous furniture (except the coffee table) to some friends who were able to pick it up right before the sectional was delivered. We were glad to only live a few days without living room furniture. We sure missed it!!

My cousin Alysun said the best way to re-decorate is to go shopping in your own home. I love that idea! We brought a shelf from up in our guestroom downstairs into the living room and swapped the dining room rug with the living room rug and got the look we wanted! The tv stand still needs to be updated and the pictures move around (we'll do that in the next few weeks).

Although it's taken us time to adjust to the new sectional, we LOVE how well it fits in our space and how comfy it is! We even had a couple friends over and comfortably fit 4 of us on there for a movie. We also love how much extra space is now in our living area so that we have more room for the baby and accessories. The only final piece we might add is a rocking chair, but the jury is still out on that one.

Projects, before and after pics, and preg pictures

2009-08-22T22:12:00.000-07:00

My parents and Christina were here a couple weeks ago and we made BRILLIANT progress on some updates to our place. Mostly some re-organizing that we wanted to do before the baby comes. Mark and I LOVE the improvements and still have a few small things to do before we can post all our before and after pictures. Here are the projects we got done:

- office addition to kitchen nook (pictures below)

- updating the dining room with furniture pieces that no longer fit in the kitchen nook and new pictures

- setting up the nursery including furniture and some decorations

- re-organizing the garage with shelving and some "man space"

- spray painted some frames and selected pictures for about 15 frames that I hung in the stairwell

- put and organized an armoire in our guestroom with all my craft stuff that used to be stored in the nursery room. Although Barb helped me do this a few days before my parents arrived.

- a bunch of other small things

Enjoy the pics!

Kitchen Nook

Before, view from the hall door way.

View from the kitchen.

View from the entry way.

Tall view from the hall door way.

AFTER view from the entry way.

View from the kitchen. Love the new valance!

View from hall door way.

Side view from hall door way. I LOVE my new office area! Love the cube shelves, the desk, having my filing downstairs, a space for my computer (it fits in the desk drawer with the charger going directly into the drawer) and just having a space to take care of things. It's also fun to have a window right there. I keep the blinds and window open during the day. We also got a charger/holder for our phones so they no longer rest on the kitchen counter. In fact, many of these things used to be on the kitchen counter, including mail that needed to be sorted or filed.

Mom sewing the curtains for the nursery.

Dad and Christina hanging the curtain rod in the kitchen. Sadly, these are the only 2 pictures I took the entire time they were here. We had a great time with them!! It was fun to have more people in our house for a week and although we thought we were ready to have our house back to ourselves, we really missed everyone the first night we were on our own again.

Me before heading out to coordinate a wedding on 9/14. 26 weeks exactly! Thanks to my friend Adri for the fantastic maternity loaner clothes! They've helped me out a ton! In fact, I think I dress better now that I'm pregnant than before and I've been thankful to not run out of cute clothes for weddings and rehearsals this summer. I coordinated a wedding yesterday and have only 1 more to go before I break for the baby.

The belly. Mark thinks it's quite cute and entertaining. Especially the fact that my belly button is quickly losing it's "inny" quality.

The beginning of one dream normally means the end of another

2009-08-11T17:30:00.000-07:00

I sat in a meeting at the end of my work day today and realized that with this beloved child I'm excited to welcome into the world in 3 months, (which is absolutely a dream I've had forever!) it means the end of another dream.

Being a mother is probably the only most consistent dream I've ever had. I'm scared to death but thrilled to be entering this phase of my life. But as I sat in this meeting tonight I realized that it means the end of any career dreams I may have had for... a long time (by choice, of course, I realize I could be a mother who also works a full-time job, but I really don't want to).

The reality is that I've almost never had career dreams. I've never known what I wanted to be or had any real aspirations. Which might explain why I never really made it very far ;) The only thing I ever imagined being while growing up, was a wife and mother. When I hit my early twenties and began to realize that dream may not come true very soon, I started thinking of some other options. I clung to Psalm 37:4 "Delight yourselves in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your heart." And nearly fell over when I finally realized that the "desires of my heart" may not mean what I thought they did. So I started re-examining my heart looking for other desires God may have put there (I was otherwise quite focused on my desire for a husband). I found a huge desire to serve, work with students, and plan events. All of these desires had a perfect piece in my life during the past 9 years (although I didn't realize the truth about that verse until probably 5 years ago).

A little over 3 years ago, after I turned 25 and bought myself the Mustang that I claimed was my substitute for a man, I met my husband. A year later we got married and have been married for almost 2 wonderful years! One of my greatest desires (although not filling everything within me, as it shouldn't) was beautifully met in a way better than I had dreamed!

One and a half years ago I got what I had thought was my dream job... coordinating events for a church which combined my love for event planning (still not sure where this came from) and my love for the church. However, 6 months later the job ended with the first of several rounds of budget cuts. I found myself in a part-time position with the same church that I dearly love, doing something that I'm reasonably good at but doesn't satisfy nearly any of my passions or gifts (although I'd like to think you can learn to be passionate about some things you wouldn't have otherwise).

So I sat in a meeting tonight realizing that I don't contribute in many ways to what is happening in the ministry I work with. Although I do my job well and I'm highly valued among my team (I never doubt this fact, they are fantastic people!), my role is 95% tasks. I don't doubt that it serves people, frees others up to focus on volunteers and relationships, but its not "me". I'm thankful that God has given me an opportunity to serve in this role because I accepted it, embraced it, and have not looked back, trusting that this is where God has placed me. I love the people I work with, enjoy my job, and take delights in things as simple as completing a task more efficiently than the week before.

I've wanted to have a baby so badly! After my part-time position started I suggested to my husband that a baby would fit naturally into my now free life and schedule. We took some time to think about it and eventually got started ;) After 8 challenging months, we got our wish. A little girl, who even though I don't know her, wouldn't trade her for all the amazing careers in the world! At the same time, I know that I'm loosing a dream. Which is funny because I never would have thought my desire to "do something" would even remotely hold a candle to having a baby, but I think I learned to love these desires that I didn't understand. The ones God revealed to me when I realized that him giving me the "desires of my heart" may not be a husband and children.

Of course, I don't see myself living as a mother who spends her days tending to her children and home (not that there's anything wrong with that). I'm too social for that. I look forward to probably joining a mom's group and looking for ways to help organize events or something of that nature. Maybe not right away, but eventually, if the opportunity arises.

So back to the meeting. I sat there tonight and realized how for the past year I haven't been living out the dream or really any desire I thought I had. At least not the one that I might have imagined I might be living. Walking back to my office I thought about how having a baby is one of my longest hopes and desires and I'm so thankful that it's finally happening (even though I'm scared out of my mind, appropriately so), I have to acknowledge that I'm a little sad that this means a few dreams and desires may not be realized or at least put to the side for a long time.

I am curious about how God will weave together all I've done and what's ahead into whatever I'll be doing in the future. On some level I love the burn he puts inside me to ooze my creative juices. Wedding coordinating and event planning on the side have definitely helped to satisfy these areas when my career wasn't it. And the "burn" has definitely gotten less intense with the baby on the way. But I know that even that desire won't be squelched for too long before I'm looking for the next thing, constantly working to make sure it's not in place of God. Besides, isn't the burn supposed to help bring us closer to Him? That's probably the one thing I miss about being single, the burn was so intense!

I think I used 'dream' and 'desire' interchangably. As I mentioned, I never really had a dream of anything career wise, but did have other desires in my heart when I started looking around for them.

Home again...

2009-07-11T21:00:00.000-07:00

We are home from our 8 days in Alaska. It was a super fun trip!! We got home this morning at 9am. In addition to the odd constant daylight situation, flights also depart at odd hours so we left on a flight at 2:30am this morning with a short layover in Seattle. Barb picked us up and we went to breakfast and then home for a long nap before transitioning into getting some things done. So far I've done a bunch of online price shopping for baby furniture and bedding (apparently I enjoy the "hunt"), have been working on laundry, got all my pictures loaded online, watched a movie while eating a pizza dinner with Mark and now... writing a blog.

Here are some pics from the week:

Breakfast the first morning. We all flew in after midnight the night before, slept in and then enjoyed a yummy breakfast at a local place before heading to the lake.

Mark on the jet ski. We all enjoyed a few spins!

I was the "spotter" on a ride with Sara as she pulled Christina on the tube so I rode backwards. It was fun!! The dog jumped on after we got back. She liked to ride on the jet ski. It was super cute!

BBQ dinner on the 4th up at the lake.

The gang working on the roof on the second day. They worked half a day on Monday and then all day on Tuesday and finished in time for the mandatory quiet time starting at 10pm.

Our roof completion celebratory dinner at Moose's Tooth.

Mark, Mom, Christina and I wandered around Anchorage the day after the roof job. Mom and I did a bit of maternity and baby clothes shopping. Before that we visiting the Captain Cook hotel that Mark remembered from when he was in Anchorage at 5 or 6 years old. This is a painting that was in the basement. Captain Cook was from the town in England that Mark's mom is from.

The day before we left JR, Molly, Mark and me went on a day long cruise from Seward, AK and saw sea otters, seals, a HUGE glacier and the big thing was a humpback whale. It was SOO cool!! And other than throwing up off the back of the boat, it was a great end to the trip! I'm really not sure why the throw up thing happened. I've never done that on a movie vehicle or boat before and didn't even feel that queasy. We are blaming it on being pregnant (even though I haven't thrown up from that either).

The last day we all didn't fly out until around 1-2:30am so we slept in, had a late breakfast, showered, packed, enjoyed a late lunch at Chili's and a small tour around town before going back to Jared and Sara's for a long nap and then just hanging out until we all left. It wasn't very dark until we were leaving for the airport at 1pm. Still so weird!

And that was our Alaskan vacation.

Now back to real life, 4 weddings in 3 weeks, and a huge motivation to get cracking on preparing for the baby. Super excited about that part! She's kicking and moving a bunch and now that we've reached 21 weeks, I feel like I can start making progress on the preparations. Mom and Dad come out the first week of August and I hope to get mom's help organizing around my house a little so I can keep up with things better when I have a little one to care for.

Roofing in Anchorage, Alaska

2009-07-07T16:38:00.000-07:00

Well, I'm not roofing. But the rest of the family is currently laboring on the roof of my younger brother's house. It's Dad, JR & Molly, Jared & Sara, Christina and my wonderful husband. They've been up there since a few minutes before the shingles arrived, around 9:30 this morning, and other than a break for a quesadillas lunch that mom and I made from leftovers, they have been hard at work!!

There are a couple good things about roofing in Alaska. For one, the weather doesn't get too hot. It's warmer than normal here but still pretty comfortable, unless you are working on top of a roof in the sun, in which case it's probably a little too warm. The other nice thing is that it conveniently stays light late into the evening. We can't work all night however, because there are mandatory quiet hours. So we wrapped up phase 1 last night right before 10pm.

On the subject of lighting, it's pretty crazy to have it light so late... it actually never gets completely dark. You go to bed at dusk and even in the middle of the night (which I know well since I have to pee once or twice a night), it's bright outside! Crazy! It's nice but really throws off your idea of what time it might be. We got back to my brother's the other night at 9pm and instead of winding down for bed, we made dinner and watched a movie. You don't realize the time until you look at the clock. It's a fun thing to experience though.

Mark and I are trying to figure out how to spend our last few days here in AK. We arrived around 12:15am Friday morning, 15 minutes before JR, Molly and Christina. We came back to Jared and Sara's and slept until we felt like getting up. We had a great breakfast at a local hot spot (which didn't "look" like the type of place you might call a hot spot in Portland) and then got ready to head to Sara'a family's cabin on Nancy Lake where we enjoyed 2 days of boating, jet skiing (which are called "personal water craft"), tubing, etc. You wouldn't think these are things you'd enjoy while in Alaska, but we did! Like I said, the weather was unusually warm so Sunday afternoon before packing up we all enjoyed a nice chilly dip in the water (without wet suits), which was extremely refreshing! And don't worry, I didn't tube or do the more rigorious activities. After all, I want to keep this child in it's currently location a little longer.

On the way home we did what is apparently the traditional stop at Millers for HUGE soft serve ice cream cones. I had quite the time with mine chocolate dipped and melting all over me. But it was worth it.

Yesterday the roofing started. Mom and Dad (who rode the Harley from Billings, MT) arrived at Jared and Sara's just after we finished cleaning up from a late breakfast. I think dad was surprised to see us all still in our pjs ;) We hung out for a short bit before breaking out lunch and then some of the crew started in on tearing off the roof while others of us ran errands. It was slightly comical as dad arrived ready to work (several hours ahead of what he'd communicated) and the rest of us, not having gotten the memo he would be arriving early, were far from ready to begin the roof work. So we had a funny half hour as dad, being very single minded, got started on the roof and the rest of us tried to mentally transition to the new task at hand, early though it may be!

Like I said before, I'm not roofing. Mom and I are designated kitchen crew. I'm (understandably) not allowed on the roof in my pregnant condition. And Mom brought too nice of clothes to work in. Well, not really. She's good in the kitchen and manages to stay busy doing things around the house, even though there isn't much to do around the house. Personally, I can't say that I mind being the inside crew as I'm near the bathroom and I hate heights, even if it's only 1 story and not overly steep. We go check on the roofers regularly and make sure they have water, gatorade, or whatever else they may need.

Like I said, Mark and I are trying to figure out how to spend our last few days as the roofing project is estimated to finish late this afternoon (there is a celebratory dinner scheduled at Moose's Tooth) and then we're free to spend the last 3 days as we please. We all leave between 1 or 2am on Saturday morning with Dad and Christina heading out on the bike Thursday afternoon. Apparently the most popular organized activities are day cruises to see marine wildlife and glaciers, or train trips to nearby towns. Both of which are reasonably spendy. So I'll hopefully blog again in time to tell you what we ended up doing.

Roofing may not the be the type of Alaskan vacation that people dream of but spending 5-7 days with family on a bonding activity like roofing your brothers house, with some play days thrown in, is sort of a Friesen type thing to do. And I like my family, so am enjoying my Alaskan vacation.

Thoughts on being pregnant...so far

2009-06-29T15:24:00.000-07:00

I wrote this post a week or 2 ago and am just now putting on the finishing touches and posting. So here you are.

- I've come to discover that the ugly rumor you hope is true when you are pregnant, is NOT true!! Let me clarify, you cannot eat whatever you want when you are pregnant. Unless you are one of those women who can't put on weight. I was SHOCKED the past few times I stupidly stepped on the scale. I'm not even sure how you can put on so much weight in such a short amount of time! And I certainly don't feel like I was eating enough to justify that kind of weight gain! I've now decided NOT to step on the scale between Dr appointments. I already only eat when I'm hungry, eat more fruit and veggies then ever before and otherwise try and be smart. NOTE: after I wrote this blog, I had a Dr appointment in which I weighed in at a more reasonable weight than I had thought. So that was cool. This no longer seems as stressful as it had before. Of course those additional hormones don't help anything.

- I decided this morning that I love my child but have been confused about whether or not I really love it because I don't have a face attached yet. But I'm getting to know it's kicks, it's bounces on my bladder, and would be devestated if anything happened to THIS baby! So I think that's love. I can't picture myself cuddling a slimy 9lb anything I just shot out of "there" but I'm pretty sure that when I get to meet the one that has been growing inside my belly I'll be nothing short of enamored with it. And if not, we have a life time to connect! But I am relieved to realize that I love THIS child! Even though I have no idea who he/she is.

- Wondering why I haven't blogged in forever? I'm so dead tired by the time we finish dinner that I rarely make it more than another hour before I'm asleep on the couch! Mark is gracious enough to clean up most nights and I'll sometimes sleep until he takes me to bed or I'll wake up after an hour and work on a few things, but am otherwise down for the count. This week I have aspirations of cleaning the house BEFORE dinner a couple nights. I think the motivation of cleaning to get food will help me out.

- Part of what is contributing to my lack of blogging and tiredness is my schedule. For the past 6 weeks or so I've been picking up extra hours at work to cover for another admin who left. And the past 2 weeks I was working even more hours to cover for my boss who was gone. Next week things will be back to normal, which will be nice since I'm falling behind in life.

- The anticipation of a new being in our home is motivating me to get a little more organized. I'm hoping I can make some necessary changes with my mom's help when she's here in August. I'm ITCHING to make some adjustments and improvements on our little place. The $$ part always scares me though.

- Yes, we are finding out what we are having and will be able to tell people in a couple weeks. It's VERY excited and strange that there are only 2 options. I have no "feeling" either way but will be excited to attach a gender to the little one. Although I still can't kick the habit of calling it "the kid". For some reason it seems too strange for me to be expecting my very own baby. So calling it "the kid" is nice a middle groun ;)

Lest this post makes it seem like I'm upset or bitter or something about elements of being pregnant, I'm NOT!! From what I'm hearing, I'm actually having a pretty comfortable pregnancy. All the first trimester symptoms of nausea, food aversions, sensitivty to smell, etc are all gone and other than being more tired, peeing all the time, and a growing belly, not much is different. I am EXTREMELY thankful to be perculating this baby. I keep thinking of the months it took us to get here and how much I've dreamed of this phase of my life and am just so thankful for my husband, our little condo, and this little one. This isn't exactly what I had imagined it would be (I think I pictured us with more money), but I wouldn't trade our life for anything!!

My life these days

2009-05-15T21:02:00.000-07:00

I think I'll blog more now that I shared the news in our life. Not to let you in on my secret, but if there's something going on I can't freely talk about then I sometimes can't talk at all, at least on my blog.

So back to the subject of this blog, my life these days...

- Today I coordinated my 3rd wedding in 6 weeks. Today's wedding was really fun with a very sweet couple. I'm discovering that weddings are not always the best time to meet couples, they tend to be stressed and tense. No big hairy stories to share yet except for the Ethiopian wedding I did 3 weddings ago. The sister of the groom arriving that morning and insisting on changing the stage layout, the entire wedding party and bride and groom, showed up an hour late for the ceremony, and a few other random things made that one by far the most interesting! But overall I'm really enjoying it and always have 1 or 2 things after each one that I would have done differently. I was really impressed with the ushers at the wedding today! Actually, everyone was really nice. It's sometimes hard for me to remember that this is their one big day when it's simply one of 10 weddings I have on my calendar. Actually, I have like 8 more scheduled through October then I'll take a break to have the kid.

- Last Friday I worked the Third Day show (see pic above). It was super fun!! Third Day is my all time favorite Christian group EVER, I have every single one of their albums and every song they sang was familiar. My boss, Janet Fraser, volunteered and since I got to be in charge of the VIP line and a few other things I put her on fun jobs where she got to be around the group and have a backstage pass. It was fun!!

- Because of an admin leaving at work recently I've had the opportunity to pick up some extra hours until they hire a replacement. Although I like the extra money, I've really been missing my Tuesday and Thursday mornings at home. But it's worth it. Although this kid is making me pretty tired lately and I used to take short naps on those mornings, which I haven't been able to do.

- Speaking of Tuesday and Thursdays, I normally workout with Trisha on those mornings. We meet at 6am at either the gym or Nike campus. We are supposed to workout another day a week but haven't made it in the past few weeks. Running has gotten SO much harder!! Not sure if it's the extra pounds I've put on or not going very often but I'm really feeling it!

- I did a Demarle party a couple weeks ago and have another one scheduled next Thursday. I LOVE being able to get myself more product! That's the deal I struck with Mark, I do the parties and he lets me spend my money on more product ;) The last party was so successful I got to invest in a new pan. All the product from the party arrived the other day and I haven't opened it up yet, but I'm looking forward to testing my new pan out out! It's only 1 pan, but I've heard nothing but really great things!!

- Last weekend Mark and I were able to spend Saturday and Sunday in Seattle for Mark's niece's 1st birthday party. Very fun!! Tegan is SO cute and it was fun to see the family. It's also kind of fun to see Michelle's friends as their families are expanding over the years we've been around for the girls' birthday parties. Of course, we also spent Sunday celebrating Mother's Day with the family. We had a yummy brunch at Marie Callendars before heading home.

- Although we had to cancel our planned annual beach weekend, we have a couple more trips planned this year. I'm going to visit my friend Marla in June for 4 days. In July Mark and I are joining my family for a week in Alaska. My brother Jared lives there so we're excited to see people and get to see more of Alaska. They'll still be in the light-all-night season so that will be interesting! In August we're taking a week vacation to North Carolina to visit Mark's family. And before you think we have loads of money to blow, which couldn't be further from the truth, we are using frequent flyer miles for both trips (my parents are helping with the Alaska one, they are very generous with their kids) and we're visiting family to help keep costs down. We decided to use our miles before they expire and the baby comes and the Alaska trip was a fun add-on we couldn't turn down!

- I'm VERY excited for spring/summer to come and stick. This morning I bought some plants and pots with Barb and look forward to trying to grow a tomato plant in a pot on our back porch. It gets good afternoon/evening sun so I'm hopeful! I really miss being able to do the big gardens like I used to at Barb's house. But they were also a lot of work.

- I have grown out of my jeans. Not really because I have a growing baby but because I have a growing body. For our photo shoot (see previous post) I wore my newest jeans and only got away with it because my loose sweater concealed my muffin top. Hah! Last week Barb saved me with a few pairs of jeans that she doesn't wear any more. That 1 size sure makes a difference!! I'll be honest that I'm seriously freaked out about getting the weight off at the end, so am trying to be a little careful but also realistic. I'm looking forward to when the baby grows enough I can start wearing maternity clothes and not just clothes to accommodate my expanding thighs and hips.

This was really long and probably not very interesting to some of you, but if you were wondering what's going on in my life, now you know!

Pictures of Us

2009-05-15T12:40:00.000-07:00

A couple months ago I bumped into a friend I haven't seen in a few years, on facebook. We used to do highschool camp together but lost touch. Funny that when we found each other again we discovered we got married within a month of each other and wore the exact same dress ;)

She is now a photographer and asked to "shoot" us. Never being one to turn down something free, I eagerly took her up on the offer. However, we had to reschedule at least once and I had to talk Mark into it, but it didn't take long ;) We've never really had a professional photo shoot done as we didn't have engagement pictures taken and a friend did our wedding pictures, although he did a great job! So this was really fun to just hangout with each other and be in love and happy while Sara took pictures. She had us do some really good poses and it was all very "us". The other neat thing is that we were already having a great day together so what you see is truly how we felt in the moment and every day with each other. We are so thankful to God for bringing us together and a little over 1.5 years from when we got married we're still desperately in love!!

You can see more of the pictures she took of us here on her blog and also on my facebook.

"Going Public"

2009-05-07T22:02:00.000-07:00

I like to use dramatic terms for something that's not so dramatic. I've been saying we aren't "going public" yet while quietly telling nearly everyone we would be "going public" to!

I really think that God's funny in how he works things out. 8 weeks to discover you have something growing inside you, deal with the reality (in our case, elated!), get used to feeling sick all the time, get used to keeping a secret while still telling your selected support system, and to get out of what I call the "danger zone", all while completely under the radar to the general public because unless you tell people, they won't know what's up. Well, it would appear we're out of the danger zone (although still sick a good part of the time) and heading into phase (a.k.a. trimester) 2 of 3.

Yes, we're pregnant! We couldn't be more excited!!! Although it doesn't really feel real yet. It's weird that you could have a little thing growing inside of you but not even know except for that frequent sick feeling and many other random symptoms. Although we did hear the heart beat today, which is really exciting! But still crazy that there is a separate living thing inside there. I keep thinking it will feel more real when we start showing but I'm wondering if it will ever feel real!! Like the other night when I sat in the living room watching tv with my husband thinking, "wow, I can't believe I'm married with a place of our own, sharing my life with my man, how cool!"

We're due November 17th and other than feeling sick (but never throwing up) 75% of the time and having an exceptionally sensitive nose and a slowly expanding body (but not because of baby just because of extra pounds ;), things are going along beautifully! At least as far as we know.

I'm going to share this next part because I would have been interested in stuff like this when we started this process.

It took us a little longer than we had hoped (7 months) and we were trying A LOT of different things to help the process along. I won't bore you with the details, but if you want to hear about it one-on-one, I'd be happy to share. Lets just say we were being VERY intentional! I was beginning to wonder if it was going to happen at all and was assured that this was normal (they say it can take normal couples up to a year with intentional effort) even though my head couldn't process how one month nothing happened but next month it could happen with pretty much the exact same "formula". It has been a very interesting journey and now that we're actually pregnant (which is still weird to say), it seems like a distant memory. Well, not entirely. But the feelings of fear and uncertainty are mostly a distant memory. But they've been replaced with fear of losing the baby and if we'll be the type to make it all 40 weeks and if it all goes well, how are we going to afford this whole kid thing? I have reminded myself many times how this is simply the beginning of a life-time of prayers towards this little one. It's hard to believe that we'll have a small being that will fill-out one of the 2 tiny outfits we've already been given. I can't wait!!!

What else has been going on?

2009-04-18T10:26:00.000-07:00

Other than our trip to Whibey 3 weeks ago, we also drove to Montana last weekend for a wedding on Saturday night. It was a great trip of visiting friends in Spokane, short visit with some of my family in Montana and LOTS of driving. But totally worth it! We had a great time together and enjoyed hanging out so much.

Mark's every-other-Friday's-off have also started. So far we've spent 2 of the 3 on road trips (Whidbey and Montana). Right now Mark is up in Seattle for an overnight trip to do some recruiting for work at his old school.

Me? I'm working on some weddings. I have one tomorrow (rehearsal tonight), another in 2 weeks, and another 2 weeks after that. And of course, my day job. My weekend calendar for the summer is quickly filling up! I've also enjoyed lots of lunch dates with friends.

While Mark is gone yesterday and today, I'm holding down the fort with Lucy, my cousin's dog that we're dog-sitting for a week. She's a super cute labradoodle. We're having a good time together, except her desire to get me up at 6:30 this morning. But after we went out for her to "do her business", we managed to squeeze out another 1.5 hours of sleep, that was fantastic! Although I can't believe how much I miss my husband in just one day!! Makes me wonder how I get through those 2+ weeks trips!!

Now you are mostly up to date ;) I'm going to go shower before lunch with a friend and then the wedding rehearsal tonight. Speaking of which, the rehearsal should be VERY interesting! It's a wedding for an Ethiopian couple. There's quite the cultural barrier when it comes to the type of ceremony and even some random things like what a prelude is. In addition to that, things aren't really done ahead of time or on time and I can't pronounce anyone's names! I've been half dreading it for a couple weeks but after a good reprimand (done in love ;) from my running partner yesterday morning that this couple deserves a special day as well (even if they don't do things the way I think they should be done), I had a quick conversation with the groom this morning and am feeling more ready to "wing it" tonight. I can see how when I'm doing weddings it will be hard to remember that this is their ONE big day when for me it's one of 10 weddings on my calendar.

Half Marathon... almost 3 weeks ago

2009-04-18T10:12:00.001-07:00

Yes, I realize I haven't blogged in FOREVER. Honestly, I'm drawing a blank when it comes to blogging.

Almost 3 weeks ago we drove to Whidbey Island for what has become our annual Whidbey Island Half Marathon race. It's a fun one to start the year with because it's a nice course and my my Mom has been able to make it make the drive for the second year. She brought her running partner from Montana and I brought mine from Portland.

It was, unfortunately, our slowest time ever for a half marathon (at least for Trisha and me), but it was a fun way to start the running year. We really hadn't trained very well so knew it wouldn't be our best.

And of course we always have a great time with Mark's parents! It's always fun and relaxing to go up there.

Mark and me before the race. He's my wonderful support system and was the one to get up early and drop us all off at the start line. He always thinks about stuff I'll need, like snacks, water, extra clothes. He's super wonderful!

From L to R: Krista (Mom's running partner), Mom, me, Trisha (my running partner). Before the race. It was a chilly morning, but got beautifully sunny during the morning.

Mom and Krista running past Mark's parent's driveway (I don't have a good one of Trisha and I). It's cool because the route takes us right past their place, twice, because it was an out and back. Mark had water for us and even some cut up bite-sized homemade energy bars his mom had for us.
Finished!! It's always great to get the first race of the year done. Being half marathon trained (even if it's not very well) by March is nice.

After the race we went back to Jack and Jean's and had homemade scones and fruit. It was a YUMMY way to end the race!! Because Montana was having snow storms that day mom and Krista had a slow drive back and did some shopping and stayed the night in Spokane while Mark, Peter, Trisha, and I headed back later that afternoon.

Update

2009-03-15T12:47:00.000-07:00

Wow, I didn't realize it had been so long since I last posted! I have a lot going on these days.

During the time of the last concert I worked (and last blog post), Mark's brother, sister-in-law and 2 kids were down visiting from Seattle for the weekend. It was SUPER fun to have them as our guests. I get a little intimidated about trying to feed people who come visit (no pressure from them, it's all self-inflicted), but it all went great and it was fun to host company!

Yesterday I hung out with my good friend Stacey, who gave me tips on how to do things quicker and easier for my quilt (I'm making a quilt of my running shirts). You have to understand that I've never quilted before nor am I using any kind of guide, just winging it, because that's how I roll. So I made a quick trip to Joann Fabrics yesterday and was excited that what I needed was on sale. So I stayed up late playing and finished the ENTIRE top of my quilt and got the back put together. So the next step is assembling and then hand quilting. Which I'm pretty excited about!! It's a long project, not a "get it done quick" type project. Not sure why I felt anyone would be interested in this, it's just fresh on my mind.

I coordinate my first wedding next Saturday. I'm a little anxious about it, but probably just because I haven't done one yet (but the bride doesn't know that ;) I am currently scheduled for about 7 between now and October. Will be cool to get a couple under my belt. The "homework" leading up to the weddings can be a lot. So will be nice when I get the hang of putting all my notes together. I have another wedding in mid-April and then in mid-May, June, 3 in July, etc.

We are driving to Whidbey Island in 2 weeks for a half marathon, our first for the year. We have been trying to train good but definitely struggling more than previous years. We aren't sure if it's because we just aren't doing what we should be or because we're getting older ;) But the fact that my mom is doing it and pushing through means we can't use "getting older" as an excuse. But we (Trisha, my running partner and I) figure we can always walk what we can't run. We're not aiming for our fastest time ever, just to finish. And we're still struggling with motivation. We're heading into our 4th year of running so aren't sure if we want to put in the work, but we like the physical results, so it's a toss up. Mark and I are both excited to visit his parents and my mom and her running partner are driving up for it. This is the 3rd year we've done this race. Seems like a good annual run.

My class ends on Tuesday. Hard to believe I've made it through the term already! I squeezed in an extra credit assignment last week so hope that will keep my grade at an A level. We are otherwise only tested on 3 things during the entire class. The final test is on Tuesday and I haven't done too much studying yet. I like to wing school just like I wing other things, remember, that's how I roll. Hah! No, I plan to study today and Tuesday before the test. I work better under pressure ;) I've decided not to take any more classes until possibly the fall. Partly for time, I'd love to have that time for the many other things going on in my life, and also because of money. We could definitely use the money that would go to school to pay off debt and help sustain us during the economic time and all that.

Last Saturday I worked the Chris Tomlin concert. With this show I helped a lot with catering because the promoter was doing it all instead of the church. Next weekend I'm working the Rockin' Worship show, which should be pretty fun!!

This is my backstage credentials. Which I "accidentally" forgot to return it ;) Hah! Actually I did accidentally forget to return it. I'm not sure if they need them back or plan to not get them back. The backstage pass is either a badge like this or sometimes a sticker that you wear.

This is the pic I got of me and Chris Tomlin. He's to my left. I am about ready to give up on taking pictures with the artists because I'm not doing very well at getting them. Either my phone messes up, the lighting is bad or something.

Saturday's concert

2009-02-23T21:49:00.000-08:00

I got to work another concert on Saturday. This one was Esterlyn, Disciple, and Kutless. My day included things like helping with breakfast catering (I did the shopping on Friday), driving the lead singer of Disciple (pic below) for a bank run, picking up the manager from the downtown hotel, helping with tickets for the early VIP seating, helping with the post-show signing lines, and taking 4 crew for an 11:30pm run to Taco Bell (we placed a $50 order through the drive-thru! At Taco Bell, that's a lot of food!). It was another memorable day!!

This is me with Disciple's lead singer, Kevin Young, who I'd taken on the bank run earlier in the day. On the drive he mentioned that he wasn't much like how he is on stage, which was totally true! Overhearing him talk nicely to his wife on the phone and then screaming lyrics in his white tank on stage was a fun transition to experience. He was really nice though and I really enjoyed their performance! Even took advantage of the free ringtone they told people how to get at the show. It's a fun momento from the experience.

This is a pic of Disciple performing. I don't have zoom on my camera phone but you can see Kevin on the big screen. They had boxes on the stage that they'd stand on, they like to move and jump around. It was fun!

This is a pic of Kutless performing. I was off to the side in the back. I tried to get a picture of me with the band but my the camera on my phone was acting funky and it didn't take. Bummer! Although I didn't have much opportunity to interact with them and always feel like I'm "using" people when I get a picture just to prove I was near them when I never really talked to them. Most of the Kutless band is from Portland so they enjoyed a day out visiting with friends and family.

Giving it all

2009-02-15T17:08:00.000-08:00

In a good way, I feel like I'm at the end of myself. I feel like I've done all I can. As I stood in church this morning singing great songs and letting the sound and feel of the music wash over my ears and the spiritual sound of the song wash over my heart I felt like God was affirming where I am. As if he was saying, "yes, this is where I want you, don't worry, I'll take care of things."

Last night Mark and I drove home after going to see Twilight (finally!) at the cheap theater with some good friends and then hanging out for a bit at their place afterwards. As we drove, my imagination ran away and I imagined something in my life I truly desire (a good desire). I let myself think of what it would be like for our lives to have this new path and I dreamed of when...

We walked in the door and I went upstairs, pausing, and thinking what could be. And I cried. It was a good healthy cleansing cry. The type that you let yourself experience as you mourn the loss of what you had hoped would be or what should have been. Mark gave me a hug and kiss and wiped my tears away and I knew in my heart that I was at the end and was letting God take it from here.

So this morning's worship was good for my soul. I have found more joy lately in where I am at... even though it's not where I thought I would be in life. But it's super fun! It's wonderful with my husband in our little house with our little routines. It's fun to drive my Mustang, work concerts, and anticipate coordinating weddings. It's interesting to attend a class again (got an A on my first test last week) and to try and do what I do well.

But I want to remember this place. I want to enjoy my joyful days and allow myself the emotion of the rough days. And invite God into them all.

Now we're off to Barb's to catch up on tv for the week and have dinner together.

My 4th job

2009-01-29T10:27:00.000-08:00

I feel a bit like the Jamacians on the old show that Mark likes, In Living Color. In their skits they would talk about how many jobs they have. Compared to them, 4 is nothing!

Here they are:

1) Part-time Worship & Creative Arts admin at Sunset Pres. I work 25 hours a week between Mon-Thur. Love the church, love my team, love my job!

2) Sunset Wedding Coordinator - as of December I was "officially" hired as the churches wedding coordinator. Although there aren't any weddings until summer so I haven't felt like I actually do this job yet, but will start getting in contact with the couples next month so it will start up soon.

3) Gig-by-gig work for a local concert promoter - this is the job where I get hired to work the day of a show and do anything needed. Which may include everything from helping with load-in, running errands, helping with catering, driving the "talent", help with meet & greet, and just keeping an eye out to make sure things run well. If I had a title it might be Production Assistant.

4) My newest job is that I've recently been "hired" as a wedding coordatinor at the Old Laurelhurst Church. My cousin actually got married there several years ago so I'm loosely familiar with the place. A mutual acquantance of myself and the owners mentioned my name when they shared their need of a wedding coordinator. I met with the gal on Monday night and am VERY excited!! I think my first wedding will be on March 7th.

I feel like #4 is a direct answer to my prayers that God will help sustain us financially. I'm hoping for at least 1 to 4 extra jobs (any of #2-4) a month. Even 1 would help us tremendously!

I'm also taking 1 class this semester (but probably won't take one during the next semester or maybe again until the fall), leading Sunset's developing Peacemaking Team, on a once-a-month rotation serving at the evening service at church, a Demarle Representative, and training for a half marathon. Somehow even though I only really work 25 hours a week I don't have time for anything more!!

Speaking of which, off to class!

Question

2009-01-22T17:12:00.000-08:00

Lord, how do I trust you with this? What does that look like for today and tomorrow and the moment when it strikes me and that's all I can think about?

Any ideas? Anyone?

I just realized I wrote 'he' instead of 'it' and Mark and I just had a good laugh about what that sounded like because there is no 'he' in my life that strikes me and what I was writing about had nothing to do with what that sounded like. Bottom line question is, how do we actively trust God with something that concerns us and we spend energy thinking and worrying about. So what does it look it like to trust God with something that I can't get out of my head?

I got nothin!

2009-01-13T22:38:00.000-08:00

Ya, I have nothing to say. Well, I have lots of things to say but either this isn't the right context for saying them or I don't have time to say anything. So this is it for now. I'm alive, fairly well, and busy.

Here was my schedule today:

7:30 wake up a little later then I should have, get the coffee started, shower, wake-up Mark, get ready, eat breakfast

9:00 leave the house and drop Mark off at the bus stop (dad is in town so borrowing the car, SO glad we have 2 cars!)

9:30 arrive at school and jet over to the library where I sit and read while drinking my coffee for an hour

10:30 move to a position closer to my class, use the bathroom and eat half my sandwich

11:00 class

12:50 leave campus and make a stop on my way to get Mark from work to drop me off at work so he can have the car

1:45 arrive at work and eat the other half of my sandwich while working

5:10 transition from admin work to Mission Connexion work (I have to keep clear lines between my paid/unpaid work)

6:55 head over to my Peacemaker Team meeting

8:35 Great meeting! Grab my stuff from my office and get a ride home with Barb

9:00 arrive home and visit with dad and Mark while I make myself dinner of scrambled eggs and English muffin

took a phone call, got updated on email, put a load of laundry in, iced my knee a couple times because it's still swollen from a fall I took running on Saturday.

10:45 going to post this and take Mark upstairs to bed. He's falling asleep on the couch right now.

Floating Vacation Day Thoughts

2008-12-29T16:16:00.000-08:00

- I have been sitting on my brothers couch for over an hour doing re-entry stuff... bank account updating, personal email, work email, etc.

- I hate re-entry stuff, even when done while still on vacation (although I think in the end it will make the actual re-entry from vacation easier).

- I wish I could post a pic, because where I'm sitting is pretty cool! My bro has a 120 inch "screen" (actually a projector on a wall) which he and Mark are using to play Need 4 Speed Undercover with the racing steering wheel setup. It pretty much feels like you are driving in real life. We are all on couches with the mini-bar, mini-fridge, mini-microwave within reach. We've already used the "I DO Movie Room" (it's named after the pics of the "I DO BREW" label that was on the special beer my uncle made them for their wedding rehearsal dinner) for about 3 movie showings since we've been here. Last night the movie showing was WANTED on blu-ray. Pretty sweet!!!

- I was trying to determine if I could afford to go snowboarding with Mark and everyone tomorrow but after realizing I'll have a $200+ bill for school books when I get back and still need to DEQ and license our vehicles, clinches my decision... no. In a couple weeks I will forget I missed out on anything anyway.

- Speaking of cars (in the plural sense), did I mention my parent's are giving us their minivan? MAJOR BLESSING!!! See, they want us to have a place for grandkids (whenever that time comes) and we can't afford to get another/different vehicle. We are driving it home from MT and are VERY excited to have a vehicle that will hold people and stuff!!

- Did I mention I'm taking classes next semester? I start on the 5th. Scary!!! That is how I am choosing to spend my extra time and hope I can make enough $$ from concerts and side projects to cover the expenses. I'm really thankful that Janet and my job at Sunset Pres is flexible enough to let me adjust my hours to accommodate the new schedule.

- Today was our vacation transition day. The rest of the visiting family left yesterday and Mark and I are moving over to JR & Molly's place from my parents. We wanted to spread the love. We are still over at Mom & Dad's for meals and stuff though. It's fun to have extra time to hang and all that.

- Mark bought me the book Twilight for Christmas (I had heard it was good) and am over half way and LOVING it!!! Which is weird since I hate vampires. It's been hard to put it down and be social. I'm trying to pace myself.

- I'm excited and nervous to go home because in addition to feeling like December was a weird month with Mark being gone, so many snow days, and being on vacation for 2 weeks, I start school. I didn't decide to start school until mid way through December so haven't had much time to process. Can I do it??? Oh, and we'll have another car... which totally changes our life dynamic. So in other words, we will be creating a new normal and life as we've known it is completely different.

- I enjoyed driving around a little on the snowy roads since I've been here. After our time in OR I was glad to find out I still had good snow legs. Mark too. Although the snow has now mostly melted off the roads.

- The guys are buying more cars now that they passed another level in the game and all this talk of reading makes me want to put the computer down and grab my book for a few minutes before we head to the parent's place for dinner.

Happy New Year!!!

Our Snowy Adventure #2

2008-12-21T13:09:00.001-08:00

We are supposed to be driving with my aunt and uncle and their 2 kids, to Montana tomorrow night. Up until today things were looking okay.

This morning my uncle called me and said that the Gorge route is closed and is supposed to be possibly as late as Wednesday... that doesn't fit in with our plans since that is the route we need to go.

Jerry & Andrea (my uncle and aunt) don't have as much time as we do for the trip so leaving a lot later isn't entirely an option for them. We on the other hand, don't have to be back at work until the 5th. So we're trying to stay open to plan B (which won't get us there by Christmas Day, but whatever).

I'll try and update more when things play out. If we end up with plan B it will mean quite the adventure for Mark and me, but we seen to have a knack for running into adventurous travel situations.

Our Snowy Adventure #1

2008-12-21T12:58:00.000-08:00

Yesterday we woke up to lots of snow. It kept snowing. And snowing. And snowing. In the morning we had a nice breakfast and drank coffee while watching a movie and then decided to brave the weather and walk to Bridgeport (about 3.3 miles away) and take the bus back. I was going to suggest that we take the bus there too but Mark wanted the exercise. Since I had walked to Barb's twice this week and to our house once, figured it was more than doable.

We were the only ones to make tracks in the snow part of the way. At least the most recent layer. By the time we got there we were questioning our decision because we were cold and hadn't seen a bus the entire time. But since we were there we opted to move forward with the movie.

7 Pounds was good! Sad, but good.

We got out a little before 4 and headed straight for the bus stop where we got the stop ID and called to find out where the bus was at, only 5.5 miles away. An hour later we were still waiting and called like the 10th time to get the status and it was 3.3 miles away!! The last time it had only been 1.2 miles away!! We were starting to wonder what on earth to do and why the bus suddenly back-tracked when we saw it coming around the corner.

By that time we were really chilly! It hadn't stopped snowing the entire day!! Our toes were numb, our legs were cold, and we weren't even sure where this bus was taking us. After the bus died at 2-3 different stops, we got to the transit center, and were considerably warmer. It was about a mile from the house and we decided to just walk the rest of the way. We actually stayed pretty warm and made it home just fine. The hot shower and hot potato soup was the perfect end to our adventure. Actually, going to bed at 9 because we were so tired from our excursion (it's hard to walk in 1 foot of powder!) may have been the perfect end.

On to snowy adventure #2, driving to Montana!!

Why we are at Barb's

2008-12-19T10:14:00.000-08:00

So, I've had a few questions about why we are at Barb's. I was reminded of the reason just a few minutes ago when I heard a Mustang on the street and as I looked out the window and saw a car just like mine trying to get out and then back into their garage and barely got anywhere, slipping and sliding.

That's why we're at Barb's. There is a more direct bus route to and from Mark's work (which he's used every day) and the potential to car pool with a 2 wheel drive car. She also likes the company and it's fun to hangout sometimes. My car is crappy in this weather, a joke really and I'd prefer not to put Simone in risk of getting messed up. Yes, it's the downfall of having your only car be a highly impractical rear-wheel-drive-wide-tired Mustang! Dad warmed me of that and I decided to move forward anyway.

Today Mark and I are moving back home. He already left for the bus and Barb and I are packing up stuff to head out. I have to pack all Mark's and my stuff from the past 5 days. We're heading into church so I can catch up on some work and help with Food & Toy. Mark and I will take Barb's car home (she's staying the night with friends) and we'll probably just hang at home for the weekend as the weather is predicted to keep up... it's snowing right now.

Snow Days

2008-12-17T15:40:00.001-08:00

I have to say, I think it's cool that I get snow days as an adult. Technically I never got them as a kid since we were homeschooled. But my mom was merciful sometimes and gave them to us after a big storm. In Wolf Point we got some wicked storms! Temps reached -40 with wind chill and when we'd go outside during the middle of the blizzard to check out what was happening we had to completely cover all skin. We didn't go out alone, dad went with us, and the dog. I can't believe our dog could survive that! Although if I remember correctly, she was always running and jumping around. She really seemed to love it!! She used to get ice balls in her paws and stop walking and try and bite them out but would always let us help her out by pulling them out.

So far this week I've had 3 snow days. Although technically I wouldn't have been working today. I'm pleased at how productive I've been! Monday we packed 2 days worth of clothes into backpacks and hiked the 3.5 miles to Barb's, yesterday we went into work for half a day (hitched a ride with our friend Ken Mulder) and then a stop at the crowded grocery store and today Barb and I saw Mark off to catch the bus and headed out on our own adventure to walk from her house to my house and back. It's about 3.5 miles each way.

We decided to go out earlier since the weather wasn't too bad yet. The walk went fine! Took a while, but otherwise was uneventful (except for seeing a car hit the curb when sliding around a turn). It's not an easy adventure, especially with ice covered sidewalks. There are significant hills, but they didn't kill us.

When we got to my house it was a mild 43 degrees. yikes!! I left the heat on 50 to keep anything from getting messed up and grabbed another day's worth of clothes and a few items we forgot or wanted, warmed up some of our clothes in the dryer and in front of the fire and put on warmer pants under my jeans and a new fleece coat and headed back. I was a little bummed our Netflix hadn't arrived, but oh well.

It had started to snow again, which actually made the walk easier then on the way there because of the snow on top of the ice, which allowed for better traction. We stopped at the grocery store for a few items but were surprised that the way back seemed almost easier.

We arrived home in time for lunch and noticed the weather quickly turn. It actually started to snow part way back, but the wind picked up after we were safely home.

After a bit of lunch and catch up time with email, I made some calls, worked on some work items and am going to move my party in front of the fire before starting on the second batch of cookies for Food & Toy drive. Figured might as well make good use of the time at home by baking for a good cause! We are having potato soup for dinner and I have to admit, I'm excited about that!!

The only bummer part of this snow day business is I can't get much (or hardly) any work done remotely!! I was glad for time in the office yesterday to gather some files to work on creating cue sheets, but since so much of what I do is making copies and other normal office flow, there just isn't much to work on from home.

Concert Pictures

2008-12-16T18:42:00.000-08:00

I'm still waiting to get the one of me with two of the ladies I work with at the concerts and Michael W Smith. But here are some others.

Michael on the piano and the backup singers with melinda in the middle.

Melinda singing with Michael in the background.

This was right after the show. I got tickets for Bruce, Barb, Ken and Sharon. I like this picture because you can also see how the stage was setup. The drapes were Rolling Hills', which looked fantastic!

I wanted to introduce Sharon to Melinda Doolittle since she also enjoyed watching her on American Idol. Sharon stuck around long enough that we snuck in at the end of the line to have her sign things and get a picture.

Evening In December Pictures

2008-12-16T18:24:00.001-08:00

Saturday the 5th I was privileged to host 7 friends at the Evening In December event. It was a blast! Here are pictures of how I set my table and who came.

These are my new Christmas dishes ;)

These are some little cakes I made with white chocolate drizzled on top with crumbled candy cane.

Me and my cousin Jenna.

Holly, Rose and Bethany. I work with Bethany and Rose's husbands and Holly's husband-to-be.

Raychel, Tracy, and Trisha.

My 2 days in another world

2008-12-13T09:03:00.000-08:00

Thursday and Friday I worked the Michael W Smith and Melinda Doolittle shows at Rolling Hills. It was awesome!!

It all started Thursday when I picked up a 15 passenger rental van at the airport and drove to the church. By 11am I was driving one of the crew, Clay, to get chains for his equipment truck and then over to the hotel. I had time to kill before my next pick-up so we grabbed coffee at Starbucks at Pioneer Square.

At 11:45 I picked up Kelley (Melinda's assistant, friend and one of the back-up singers) and headed to the airport to pick-up Melinda. As Kelley was waiving her down, I sat there thinking, "I can't believe I'm about to pick-up Melinda Doolittle!!"

We picked her up and headed to the church. They were both VERY nice!! And it was fun visiting with them a little. We got to the church and I got to sit with them and some of the other crew while eating a late lunch. I sat next to George Huff (sp?) who was on American Idol a season I didn't watch so I had no idea who he was and tried to make conversation by asking, "what do you do?" or something like that and later felt a bit silly when I found out who he was.

Oh, and in the craziness of the day I had left my purse at Starbucks!! Yikes!! I realized after I got back to the church and called over there and someone had turned it in and Clay was nice enough to go get it for me (even though it meant he had to carry a purse a couple blocks). Crazy!!

Things got underway with rehearsals and then box office opened and then doors opened and the show started. I ran out at 9 to pick-up the bus drivers from the hotel and then got back and was privileged to tag along when the promoter took almost the entire group to a nice dessert near the hotel. That was cool!! But I didn't get into bed until after 1:30!!

Yesterday morning I picked up Kelley and Melinda at the hotel at 9:20 and took them to a radio interview, which they were nice about letting me tag along to (I felt like entourage ;). It was cool to see how it all worked. They taped it to edit and air later, which I was able to catch later in the day. Then I drove them by Borders to pick up a book.

After I dropped them off at the hotel I killed 45 minutes by grabbing a quick bite at the Nordstrom cafe. Then I picked up Melinda, Kelley, and Michael W Smith to take them to the Ronald McDonald house and I GOT LOST!!! Talk about pressure! I felt so bad but eventually got them there. But not after taking a couple sudden u-turns across 4 lanes of traffic in a big van. Not sure I made the best first impression. After I dropped them off I took the time to make sure I knew how to get back to the hotel, which I'm glad to say I did without getting lost.

I made another trip with Clay to a different hotel closer to the venue and one with bus drivers before making a run for bus stock (food) before the show and got to see the inside of the crew bus helping put the food in there. I was impressed with how clean it was.

Last night there a couple more pick-ups and I got to sit in on part of the show and both nights I helped with the meet & greet line, which I enjoy. The entire thing was really cool!!

During the intermission of last night's show I passed Melinda's dressing room and she asked me to come in for a second and showed me a huge bouquet of flowers that a fan gave her and told me she wanted me to have them (that was when I took the picture that's posted). So now I have a huge, beautiful, and wonderfully smelling bouquet of flowers on my coffee table.

By the time I did the last run to pick-up the second bus driver last night, things were almost completely wrapped up at the church so I said a few good byes and then headed back to the airport to drop the van I had bonded so nicely with over the past 36 hours.

I just finished cleaning my kitchen and am about to head to bed, with Mark!! Finally!! He went to bed about 20 minutes ago because it's like 4am his time and he really hasn't slept. He was gracious enough to stay awake through my work Christmas party. I have 1 or 2 more pictures to post when I get them. It was a crazy fun 2 days, but am glad to be slightly more back to normal. Although I love working those shows, the coolness of being around the artists is still very novel. By the way, the show was fantastic!! Both Michael W and Melinda really rocked it! And it was really neat to get to know her and will probably be one of the firsts to purchase her new album when it's realized February 3rd.

And that's all I have to say.

life

2008-12-10T18:01:00.000-08:00

I've written like 2 blogs this week but haven't felt like any of them are worth posting. Right now I feel pretty bummed because Mark told me today that his trip is probably getting extended. Not sure how long but sounded like they would practically need a miracle tomorrow and even then wouldn't come home until Saturday.

Everything I write seems so dramatic and silly. But I will say that life without Mark just feels so far off that I struggle. It's hard to do normal daily life without him around and if that's dramatic and silly, then I'm happy to admit that I'm that way.

There are things happening in my life but it seems to take all I have in a day to look at God and plow through. So I'll try and update more when my better half comes back and I can feel whole enough to look past this current solo status.

I remember my mom once telling me that in marriage you can feel more complete but you can also feel more lonely. Although my husband is returning and our marriage is wonderful, having him away makes me feel more lonely than before (not to discount those of you who live every day that way... I'm just saying, this is how I feel in the moment). It's like getting a glimpse of how great it can be and then having it taken away. But fortunate for me the taken away part is only temporary and I'm trying to keep focused on the light at the end of the tunnel!

A day in the life part 2

2008-12-05T17:44:00.001-08:00

I can't remember exactly where I left off, but I think it was when I was upstairs and had just finished the bathroom. So here's how the rest of the day played out:

3:00 put cleaning supplies away, started bath mats in the washer, put laptop and stereo back downstairs and vacuumed the entire house. I hate vacuuming more then any other task, EVER, so was glad when that part was over.

3:30ish got cake batter ready to bake and the oven on, took a break to write some email then put the cake batter in the molds and put them in the oven then started the gingersnap cookie dough... took my time with this as I wasn't going to be able to bake them for a while.

4:15 baked a couple more molds of the little cakes and got the cookie dough mixed up. Also put Elf on the tv.

Honestly, this is about as much as I remember. There was some running around getting all the stuff out for my Evening In December table for tomorrow night and getting changed (never got out of my workout clothes) into my pjs to head over to Barb's for the evening and night. I'm about to load up the car and head to Barb's where I'll finish baking the cookies and enjoy dinner and maybe a movie.

Hope you have a great weekend!

A day in the life

2008-12-05T15:00:00.000-08:00

What would YOU do with every Friday off? Well, here's what I did today. (By the way, I'm stealing this idea from a previous blog of Jocelyn's)

Next Friday will be different since I'm working the Michael W Smith concert, but today, this is it:

7:00am roll out of bed, brush teeth and throw on gym clothes

7:35 meet Trisha at the gym and do 35ish minutes on the treadmill walking/running and 40 minutes of circuit resistance training.

9:00 pull into Panera for a bagel, coffee and time to work on my Bible Study

9:45 head out to run errands, the grocery store for a short list, the bank to get cash, the post office to get stamps for Christmas cards, Value Village for ugly sweaters for Mark and I for a Christmas party next week.

11:15 get home and empty car and hop on the computer for an hour to catch up with email and create my playlist for cleaning.

12:30 have lunch and sit for another 45 minutes

1:25 drag myself up from the couch to start cleaning, get setup with music upstairs (have my computer rigged to play through the Bose since Mark has the ipod), load all the cleaning supplies upstairs and get started on 1 of 3 bathrooms.

2:20 take a quick sustenance break before starting on bathroom number 2 and decide that bathroom number 3 can probably wait a couple weeks.

2:40 get a call and write a quick email

2:50 finish bathroom and do a couple more emails and write this blog

And that as far as I've gotten so far. The plan right now is to put the cleaning supplies away, drag my stereo contraption back downstairs, vacuum the entire house and then get started on baking some desserts before heading to Barb's around 5ish.

God?

2008-12-03T14:45:00.000-08:00

I often forget about God during the day, week, month and year.

Right now I'm sitting at my desk feeling odd. It could be the crash after my morning coffee, the rest after helping plan our staff Christmas party lunch, the growing shopping list I have for my short evening, the fact that my husband is gone, the possible lost opportunity I haven't gotten the final word on or other things swirling in my heart and mind.

Whatever it is, I forget that God's in the middle. He's aware of and wants to interact with my emotions from something as simply as a caffeine high and low. He's aware of my growing shopping list and my desire to be a wise steward of my time and money. He knows my husband is gone and it can make me sad and he's thankful for the love we share that allows us to miss each other so much when we are apart. He knows about the opportunities present in my life and has a perfect plan for how they play out (even when they don't make sense to me). He is in the middle of my heart and therefore is surrounded by what's inside there swirling around. He gave me the desires, knows the fears and loves how they make me remember him.

Psalm 84:11 For the LORD God is a sun and shield; the LORD bestows favor and honor; no good thing does he withhold from those whose walk is blameless.

Jeremiah 29:11 For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

2 Corinthians 1:3-5 Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God. For just as the sufferings of Christ flow over into our lives, so also through Christ our comfort overflows.

I've been realizing lately how true these statements are. "In the moment" I don't want to believe them. I feel like they have to be fake because if they were true, wouldn't I feel better?? But it's so not about what I feel like believing. It's about what I choose to believe and what I choose to believe can change how I feel. So I want to make good choices. But I hate making good choices because something in me likes feeling hopeless. Because being hopeful means I am making the hard choice to believe what God says is true and not just words on a page (or on the screen) and if what he says is true then you can't help but have hope because if he really won't withhold good things from me, wants to give me hope and a future, and does comfort me in my troubles, then where is the problem with how my life is at this moment??

Ah, the age old battle! For some reason it always comes down to whether or not I'm elevating my idols and trusting God. Idols and trust, trust and idols. That's always what it's about for me.

1 down, 11 to go

2008-12-02T08:30:00.000-08:00

I have 1 day of Mark being away down and 11 more to go! So far so good. I almost started crying when I left him a voicemail (that of course he won't get until he's home, but gives me a verbal outlet for the things I'm feeling) last night on the way home while chowing on a package of Cracker Jacks I picked up at the gas station when filling up the Mustang. The cracker jacks were a mistake, I'll be the first to admit that.

As I pulled off our exit, trying to warm my cold hands, I remembered something Mark had said on the way to the airport yesterday. He was holding my hands, trying to warm them up (a regular occurence), and said, "what will you do without your delux gloves that you can talk to, curl up to in bed with, and who takes care of you?" We have a joke about how he's my swiss army knife of hand warmers because he can do all those other things as well as warm my hands and cold toes at night ;) The memory made me smile.

Being home without him wasn't as bad as I feared, which was nice. Not that it was good or that I enjoyed any part of being alone, but it could have been a lot worse. I think you get used to being alone with your own thoughts. Normally I have a way of sharing them, but alone isn't the end of the world. Again, I have no idea how you single peeps do it!!! I think God gives single people extra grace. To not have your own person to go through life with and process things with and share things with is/was hard. But I never lived alone. I think that takes an extra measure of courage. It's hard to not have a designated person that is yours for the journey. I admire those of you walking it alone. Most of the time it's not by choice so to do it, do it well, and not loose heart in the process is pretty cool. It's definitely harder, although without some of the relational drama. So WAY TO GO all you God-loving single people!!! I admire you. And am thankful I only have to live it temporarily.

My holiday damper

2008-12-01T15:26:00.000-08:00

Thanksgiving with Mark's family was great! It was wonderful to be with everyone and in traditional form, it was exceptionally relaxing!! I don't think Mark and I left the house once from when we arrived until we left, except to take a walk on Thanksgiving day. Friday was pretty fun because we never got out of our pjs and watched the entire Bourne Identity trilogy. I also started and finished a book that Mark's mom suggested (and brought another one home with me). We only took about 3 pictures the entire time, which I'm sure I'll regret later. But otherwiser it was wonderful to hangout and catch up with everyone and bond over the weekend.

But today I'm feeling really sad because Mark flew out 2 hours ago, for 12 days in Germany. He feels good about the potential he might come home earlier, but either way he's gone. I feel like there is a lot happening while he's gone, in addition to the holiday season, which we both really enjoy. It makes me not feel much like decorating since I probably won't spend tons of time at home while he's gone and when he comes home we only have a little over a week before we head to MT for Christmas.

The time right before he leaves it always bitter sweet because you love that you are still together but there's this anticipation of the time apart. I am always a tiny bit relieved when the separation has started and the count down to when he comes home has started. But it's really sad to be apart!! I start thinking about how he won't be next to me in bed, he won't be with me to get ready in the mornings, he won't be there to tease me about silly things and smile at me and laugh at me in the car when I try and sing. He won't be there for me to try and feed or pick up from work or drop off at work or take care of. It's just me.

Those of you who are already single will, I assume, say, "that is nothing! Try living every day like that!" So I'm not down playing anyone else's life. This time often makes me think of Barb or my email friend Addie, who once had it good and now don't. But it sort of doesn't make me feel much better because Mark still won't be there when I get home or be simply a phone call away or just down the road at his work.

So with the strange morning spent dropping him off and breakfast together and now at work with a weird 2 weeks ahead of me and trying to wrap my brain around work after the holiday break, I'm just feeling very off today. I'm always a bit scared to see how I'll feel walking into our place alone for the first time after he's gone and wondering if I'll manage okay or burst into tears and if I'll like being at our place because it makes him feel not so far away or if I'll hate it because it's a huge reminder of the fact that he's gone. This is his 5 trip away since we have been married and I don't like it any more now than the first one.

On a side note, I decided not to paint. I still want my downstairs painted but I have too many other things I need to get done that are much higher priority and honestly, don't have the $100+ it would take for the paint and supplies. So, that project will have to wait for another time!

I'm sure I will think on the bright side and try and focus on the fun things happening over the next 2 weeks, but for right now it just seems super sad and I fight off tears if I think about it and dread going home. I think I'll end up Barb's place most nights.

1 hour until my Thanksgiving break

2008-11-25T17:19:00.000-08:00

Yes, it's only 1 hour (and 10 minutes to be exact) until my Thanksgiving break officially starts!! I consider the start time to be the moment I am finished at work. It's not that I dislike work, but it's the last "commitment" I have before the break and lets be honest, the last day/hours before a break are always the longest.

Tomorrow morning Mark and I head up to Whidbey Island to spend the weekend with his family. I was telling Mark last night that I LOVE going to Whidbey and hanging with his family!! Not only is it beautiful and a place people like to vacation and we get to visit and stay for free - and did I mention that his parent's place is right on the Sound? Literally! It's the main road, private drive, house, large yard, and cliff to the water. They have a little tram that goes down to the water. It's pretty sweet!!

In addition, his parents are SUPER great!! His mom cooks fantastic food and some of it I've never had before like Yorkshire Pudding and my favorite, Ice Box Pudding (can you tell I'm a dessert girl?). And they let us sleep in, do whatever, and just relax. We try and help as much as they will let us (which is probably more than we actually help) with meals, but otherwise we get to enjoy the vacation.

But of course, the best part is the family. We get to play with the niece's, the little poodle dog Emma, and play games with everyone before bed every night. I'm not a big game player, so this is a big deal for me. And other than sometimes being a sore looser, it's a wonderful time!! Mark and I have similar views about things like sleeping late, never getting out of our PJs, and watching movies and eating (although I tend to do more of this than he does). So we are great vacation buddies and of course, I can never get enough time with him!!

The only bummer part about this weekend is that Monday Mark leaves for almost 2 weeks in Germany. And although I'm glad that if he has to leave town he gets to go to a place he's never been, I'll miss him like CRAZY!! So I'm kicking around the idea of painting the entire downstairs while he's away and sleeping at Barb's and have moved all the girlie movies to the top of our Netflix queue.

On the subject of painting, I HATE painting. But after watching lots of HGTV and then seeing a friend's new condo with creamy walls, I decided it's probably time. Since I hate painting so much I had decided to put it off until I was in the mood to brave a despised task (which I think is now). Mark actually prefers white walls, so it's taken a great deal of sweet talking to convince him to let me do it. Even now I'm not sure he has said yes, but he hasn't said no. So I think I'm good. I've promised him I will try and do a color he won't even notice isn't white (he's partly color blind). My plan is to do a neutral (warm) brownish color with a darker accent wall and a burnt orange nook (yes, burnt orange, don't talk me out of it). So Monday night after work and Mark is on his way to Germany, I will probably be at my nearest Lowe's getting paint color samples and will convert my downstairs to plastic-floor covered mess. I'm assuming it will take me at least 2 evenings to clear everything from the walls and near the walls and tape, before I can even get started. We'll see. I might chicken out at the last minute. That's a lot of painting for someone who is NOT good at the detailed edges!

Happy Thanksgiving!!

Wondering Wednesday

2008-11-19T16:02:00.000-08:00

Today my mom and I emailed and called our email Wondering Wednesday. Here's what I'm wondering:

- I wonder why I seem to fight having mid-week days off so much?

- I wonder when my schedule will feel normal?

- I wonder when my schedule will change (you know, they always do)?

- I wonder how long it will take me to sort through and file the huge file-pile upstairs?

- I wonder why some things don't happen the way I want?

- I wonder why God and I sometimes seem to want different things for my life?

- I wonder when we will ever hang the little mirrors we bought for above our fireplace?

- I wonder what next year will hold?

- I wonder why I am more motivated to clean my kitchen when there are a lot of dirty dishes instead of just one, like right now?

- I wonder what I will do Friday, on my next day off?

- I wonder if I'll be able to make it to work before 9 tomorrow?

- I wonder why I always forget about my Bible Study until Monday (we meet on Wednesday night)?

- I wonder why it sometimes feels easier to fight God then give in.. when that's the (obviously) better path?

And that's about as deep as I can get right now.

Our Weekend - Rian's 3rd birthday

2008-11-19T10:02:00.000-08:00

Last weekend Mark and I went up to Seattle to celebrate Rian's 3rd birthday. She told us how she had 3 parties, which was true! We had 2 for her, one on Saturday with friends and one on Sunday with the family. We also celebrated Jean's birthday (Mark's mom). It was a fun never-ending birthday weekend!!

Some Highlights

Me and Rian, hanging out on Saturday morning.

Me and Tegan. I LOVE my nieces!!

I think Uncle Mark does too.

Grandpa Jack with Tegan at Build-A-Bear for Rian's birthday party with her little friends.

Rian and all her friends. They were pretty cute picking out their bears!

Jean opening her gifts with Rian.

Birthday brownies ;)

Grandma jean reading the book to Rian that we got her for her birthday. Ruby Has Tea With The Queen (or something like that).

Twitter. What the??

2008-11-17T14:39:00.001-08:00

So, I guess I'm now twittering. I never planned to. Always figured I shouldn't be writing things in the heat of the moment. Oh well. I'll just try and use good judgement ;)

I'm here and am now following anyone I know who has it. So if you do, let me know.

Mom and Christina on homepage

2008-11-17T11:30:00.000-08:00

We have a copy of Today's Christian Woman, which features an article about Mom and Christina. Apparently, they are also on the homepage. Check it out! http://www.christianitytoday.com/tcw/

Home for the day

2008-11-12T10:20:00.000-08:00

No, I'm not sick. I'm part-time.

This week is really the first time I've felt part-time. Up until this week I had a Wednesday gig watching a friend's son but she had a new little baby and is off for a couple months. And even on my Friday's off I was sometimes working concerts or had the entire day scheduled with activities. Don't get me wrong, I have today scheduled, but it's with activities at home. I don't have to be anywhere until the gym at 6pm to workout with a friend.

So I'm home. I originally had elaborate plans of plowing through housework by 12:30 and heading into the church office where I was going to work on details for events I'm doing on the side, but as I woke up this morning, a day at home seemed more fun. Actually not rushing seemed the most appealing, so I shifted my plans.

It's weird to be home all day in the middle of the week and to be honest, I'm not loving it. Well, I love being home, but don't love that I don't have more work. It's a culture shift to go from full-time to part-time. And although I'm thankful we can survive financially this way, I don't feel like I have a good reason for not working full-time. And because it's just now hitting me how part-time I really am, it feels like a small identity crisis. Which I feel I experience often these days.

This morning as Mark and I got up and I got ready for the day with him, like normal, he said to me, "why are you even up?" The question made me laugh. I feel a sense of responsibility to use my days off well. To be productive. Heck, I almost am more productive on my weekdays off then any other days of the week! I guess I feel that if I'm not able to bring in money at least I can care for our home and contribute in that way. It also helps free up my weekend days to relax more with Mark because we don't have to worry about cleaning or other things we don't want to do.

So as I sit in our big comfy chair, listening to Third Day, in front of a warm fire, emailing with family and finishing my Bible study, I ask, "God, what are you doing?" Then I sit back, put the computer away, pick up my journal and write this all out to God, resting in the truth that He has a great plan and taking joy in the realities of my life I wouldn't necessarily have chosen for myself. There is something very peaceful in knowing that God is in control and it's a great thing. And I feel the hope that Jeremiah 29:11 suggests.

And then I go pee.

You know you are tight on cash when...

2008-11-10T10:42:00.000-08:00

You determine that Netflix is cheaper then seeing/renting movies. But think it's dumb when you can't justify the money to see a movie and enjoy popcorn and soda.

You make dinner at home, even when you are starving after work, because you don't have enough cash to eat out and still make it last until the next pay day.

Having friends over, is wonderful, but you're disappointed it doesn't leave you enough left-overs for lunch the next day.

You eat a little less dinner so you can leave enough for lunch the next day.

Taking an extra trip across town means you may not have enough gas money to get you through the month (although this is slightly less of a problem now that prices have gone down).

You check craigslist every other day to see what new part-time job posts have been listed.

You update your resume every couple weeks to reflect the type of experience for the extra work you are trying to apply for.

You determine you aren't above any type of work, except you still prefer to stay away from cleaning houses, if possible (not because you are above it, you just hate it, a lot).

You try and view staying within your budget as a fun challenge to keep from getting frustrated at the things it seems you can't do.

You stop realizing there are things you can't do because you get used to living without them (I guess this is the good part).

Friday and Saturday nights are spent in your "comfy clothes" watching whatever Netflix brought in and eating your homemade dinner creation, snuggled up next to your favorite person, on your couch with a cozy blanket and thinking life isn't so bad ;)

God thoughts today... in the raw

2008-11-03T16:37:00.000-08:00

This is how I felt earlier today. Now, I'm feeling better. Female hormones, you never know what they'll do next!! Hah! Although I have to say that even though this isn't how I'm feeling right now, this is how I feel sometimes. So although not true in the current moment, they are still true. Right now I'm thankful for the reprieve from feeling the way I write below ;) God must have already answered my prayer!!

Barb always says, "it's not about Joe Bob (or whoever I'm frustrated towards), it's more about you". This generally comes on the heels of me expressing how if so-and-so would just do ... then my life would go better. But she's right in that I'm reacting more out of myself then what the other person did/didn't do. If I didn't want it so much or act like I needed it, then why would I be so upset at not getting it?

I think the same thing happens with God. I get frustrated when he doesn't do something I want or does something I don't want, "God, if you had only done ... then my life would be better". The truth is not about God, which is what I want to convince myself of. It's just me throwing a temper-tantrum about why I didn't get the thing I seem to think I NEED.

James 4:1 "What causes fights and quarrels among you? Don't they come from your desires that battle within you?" I'm having an internal fight over a desire that I'm not getting. It's as if my God-man and my flesh-man are duking it out and I get to will the winner. They spar, throwing punches back and forth, getting hit in the gut, the face, kicked in the shin and their arms bent, almost breaking under the pressure of their opponent.

Just as with Christ vs Satan, I know who the winner will be in the end. But for some reason it gives me a sense of cruel comfort (so I think) to allow my God-man to get beat up a little before allowing him to win battle. And just as Christ did for us, he allows himself to take it. I throw a frustrated word, an angry heart, a curse word and shaking fist in his direction, hateful thoughts before I drop to my knees.

Why is my reaction to hurt, good healthy and real hurt, anger and frustration? Wouldn't letting my God-man wrap his arms around me instead of pushing him into a fight with my flesh-man, be of more comfort?

Go for it God-man! Pummel my flesh-man and win this battle before I keep willing another match! Help me let you touch my heart and wrap your arms around me before I push away in anger for not giving me what I think I need when you have already given me everything I DO need Psalm 84:11 "For the LORD God is a sun and shield; the LORD bestows favor and honor; no good thing does he withhold from those whose walk is blameless."

Perspective

2008-11-03T09:39:00.000-08:00

Notes from yesterday's sermon. Sometimes these don't feel true. But I'm glad that even when something doesn't feel true, it can still be true. Isn't it great that we can take comfort in these truth statements?!!

God is at work in your life for good even if you resist him.

God is at work in your life for good if you surrender to him. SURRENDER!

Looking for ways God is at work in your life will change our perspective on life.

Amy Grant Concert

2008-10-28T09:35:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I worked the Amy Grant Concert at Rolling Hills. It was a great show!! And although I'm not Amy's biggest fan (which was confirmed when I met several from the fan club), I did totally feel privileged to work the show and walk down the backstage hall and smile at her when we locked eyes from the open door of her dressing room. I really do think it's a blast to work these shows!! It's a long and tiring day, but SO fun!!

So, I'm the first to admit I get terribly star struck and tongue tied around "the talent". I discovered this when getting my copy of a Donald Miller book signed a couple years ago. I loved his books and they were hugely impacting on my life at that time but as I stood in front of the author I was surprised to stumble over some silly words with a goofy smile on my face and my neck covered with splotches! My friend who was in line with me laughed when we were done. It was quite funny. And earlier this year when I met Shawn McDonald, I blushed and felt quite awkward! I decided I just didn't need to meet the talent. Walking the same halls with them and helping make their shows a success is good enough for me!!

This was the soundcheck "party". I met and escorted the fan club (who had gotten a special invite) to come hear the soundcheck and then meet her afterwards. It was the longest soundcheck I'd ever been to, but the band and Amy Grant were fantastic!!

This was taken during the actual show. It was really fun!! I recognized a lot of the songs (because it was a replica of her "Lead Me On" tour from 20 years ago) and thought they were appropriately updated so really enjoyed it!

Me with Amy Grant. Other than locking eyes and smiling earlier in the day, she had also previously commented on how she liked my hair streaks. That was cool!

I helped manage the meet & greet line after the show and got in on the end of it having her sign my nametag and also getting this picture. Yet again, I fumbled all over myself making some silly comment about "how this is very important to me" when trying (for the second time) to get the picture. I mumbled through something to her about it being a great show and felt bad she had to wade through so many people, but she was very gracious!

And lastly, I drove home with a bouquet of flowers on my passenger seat, that Amy handed to me as she walked out. They weren't exactly for me, but I was in the entry way with several others when she was leaving and asked if any of us wanted the flowers a fan had given her because they didn't travel well. No one spoke up so I said I'd take them.

I like my life!

Friday Floaters

2008-10-24T16:13:00.001-07:00

By the way, I like the "floater" reference because it makes me think of something else ;) Hah!

- I'm not feeling 100%. Not sure why... I've been around sick people lately and I hope what I'm feeling doesn't turn into anything.
- My husband is still the best thing in my life!! Seriously! He made me laugh all the way into work and I won't tell you what we laughed about in the car yesterday (lets just say it had something to do with what "floaters" makes me think of ;) We don't feel mature enough to be adults!
- Mark and I are using a gift card for our dinner tonight. I like the goal of trying to keep the purchase no higher than the price of the card. So we only have to pay for the tip!
- Other then not wanting to be unwell, I don't want to be under-the-weather because I have a fun morning/afternoon of scrapbooking at my friend Stacey's tomorrow.
- Yesterday's Sanctus Real concert rocked!! Although staying up until after 1am didn't. I woke up feeling like I was hit by a truck. Is that what getting older feels like?
- I'm having fun trying to tell people about Demarle. But I was recently told I wasn't being aggressive enough... so watch out!!! You better sign up to host a party before I come after you ;)
- Work is fun lately with everyone moving around. I like having my team in my area. Tuesday's are now much more lively!
- Happy Friday!!

French Onion Disaster

2008-10-22T16:48:00.000-07:00

I've tried a lot of new recipes over the past year. I would say that 75% of them were home runs, 24% Mark suggested we NOT put on the rotation, but we ate it that one time. And then there's the 1%, French Onion soup.

I haven't been so good about cooking much lately (other than quick/easy type meals that come in a box), but given our budget constraints and tiring of the same type of things, I decided to branch out. I picked about 5 new recipes. One of them was a French Onion soup recipe from a new crockpot cookbook I got from Powell's a while ago. Honestly, I should have looked at the book more closely before I purchased it because I'm not sure I've used anything out of there yet. They are a bit impractical for our life. Any crockpot meal that only requires 7 or less hours of cooking, doesn't work for our schedule. I use the crockpot because I'm not home for long periods of time.

Being in the mood for soup and finding a recipe that let you cook for 8-10 hours, I thought it would work. Not so much! I'm pretty sure I followed the recipe and instructions to the letter, but unless cooking it one hour longer than recommended ruined the entire thing, it was the worst excuse for French Onion soup I could imagine!! The only redeeming part was the bread and cheese, which we used to make grilled cheese sandwiches when the the soup proved inedible!

Now my house (and coat) smell like stinky onions. And it's not a regular onion smell, I love onions, we decided it smelled more like fermented onions. Yuck!!! I didn't even know a small like that existed!

Does anyone have a good french onion soup recipe that's quick/easy??

Don't hate me, but I'm selling...

2008-10-18T10:39:00.001-07:00

I know, everyone is always trying to sell you something. And I've just joined the ranks! But I have to say, I'm very excited about it! I feel a bit like an infomercial when I tell people, but it's just fun. So here's why I'm becoming a rep:
- I like to meet people and talk, so it's a good fit!
- I like to eat and doing a party is a chance to share food with others.
- I love the product so appreciate being able to talk about how neat it is.
- I've always wanted to sell something like this and hadn't ever heard of this product until a couple months ago and thought it was rad, so figured now is as good a time as any!
- And of course, being able to earn money to fund my spending habits (but I'm being honest when I say this is more of an added benefit).

Here's what I'm selling. It's called Demarle and it's cool. (And here comes the sales "ask") So if you like what you see on the website and want to hear more about it or want to host a party to earn money towards buying something you like (I won't lie, the stuff's not cheap), then let me know. I can also do what's called a "Show & Go" where I just come and make you something to demonstrate the radness of this stuff. Or if you just like a chance to get your friends together, I'll do all the work!!

Mark turned 30!!

2008-10-13T20:39:00.000-07:00

My dear husband turned 30 and in his desire to NOT be the center of attention, I tried to lay fairly low in the celebration of this special occasion. Although his birthday celebration went on for quite a while!! It started with cake the night his parent's came to visit in late September, then moved into a "small" family and close friend party on the 3rd and then his actual birthday on the 9th. Celebrated with Bruce and Barb out at a movie. It all ended with a fancy dinner out with just Mark and I. He'd been asking for an excuse to do a nice steak dinner in Portland so we figured this was as good an occasion as ever. It was very nice and a wonderful end to the birthday festivities!

The Ironman cake our friend Trisha made.

Mark and I at his family party.

I meant to post several more pictures but through wrestling with blogger, I finally gave up!

Purpose

2008-10-07T11:01:00.001-07:00

Since my last blog title sounded almost like a confession, I feel like this one should, "I struggle with purpose".

I supposed it is like a confession. I struggle with purpose. I always have. When doing a "nothing" job I wonder what contribution I'm making to the world and when I have a purposeful job, I wonder why I don't feel like I'm making more of an impact.

Working at a church as an admin is difficult in that you aren't as close to the action. I feel like I can see how everyone around me could feel a sense of purpose, but I don't really. Don't get me wrong, I really enjoy my job (yes, even making copies), there is something rewarding about checking things off my list every day. Right now I have a little bit invested in a lot of things that it doesn't feel like I have one single focus.

But I DO have a single focus... God! I just don't know what that looks like when I wake up in the morning. Last night I didn't have to do anything. In fact, that is how I spent my weekend so last night I didn't feel like just sitting on the couch was the way to go (literally, that is what I did for half of Saturday), so I opted for working on a sewing project. But when you wake up the next morning knowing that you did nothing to contribute to the world the night before, or all weekend, then you wonder... "what the he** is my purpose?"

I don't struggle with purpose all the time and I definitely don't just sit on my couch all the time. Last weekend was a rare slow one and I loved it!! But in the days where purpose seems a far off thing and the dreams you make up that seem like would make your life feel like it has purpose (e.g. "if only I was doing blank, then I'd have purpose"), don't happen... what do you do?

In my peacemaking study (by the way, I don't have an answer to the aforementioned question), they talk about how conflict can reveal idols (a.k.a. good desires gone bad) and I feel like that's what my current struggle for purpose is doing. Something I want, isn't happening, and it makes me frustrated. My frustration examined reveals a desire that I've elevated to a demand, need, etc. My good desire needs to be let go of, brought captive back to God, and my knees back on the floor as I desperately plea with God to help me let go of my idol, desire, and even hope for tangible purpose, and trust that what he says in Psalm 84:11, "no good thing does he withhold from those whose walk is blameless". And although my walk is far from blameless, I don't think he withholds something good from me (even though that's what it feels like). Oh why does it always feel like what I want and what God wants are so far off???

I do poorly at everything I just mentioned. I don't trust God. I don't get on my knees. I don't look to him as my purpose. I am not content. I am never satisfied. I get discouraged that I will never be content or satisfied. I am always seeking after something. I always think my new thing will make me happy and solve all my problems. And this is the truth. I am convinced I will never know my purpose. I am convinced that God doesn't intent me too. That his intention (or purpose) is exactly what I'm doing right now. I'm not succeeding, failing, or anything. I'm just living. Granted it's pathetic sometimes and a poor excuse for a Jesus follower. But this is the best I got. And I think that's all he wants.

I like to not feel like I'm failing so I think that if all of that is really true, then I feel better ;)

I am a peacemaker

2008-09-30T09:46:00.000-07:00

I figured if I declare it on my blog then it will make me more responsible to live this way. Although given my actions last night at home, you'd never know it!! Funny how God gives us opportunities to practice our newly acquired skills so quickly!! I think I passed and then dramatically failed tests yesterday. Let me tell you more...

11 years ago I interned for the summer at a ministry called Peacemaker Ministries. It was the summer before my Sr year of highschool. I read The Peacemaker that summer. It changed my life. Before I read the book I didn't think I had conflict and afterwards I realized my life was riddled with it!! And I now had great tools in how to deal with it.

Fast forward a year, I had fallen in love with the ministry over the summer and was offered a job after I graduated so I moved out there (Billings, MT) 2 weeks after I walked the stage.

I started off in the resource department and moved up to the event coordinator within a year. I LOVED it!! But lots of work! A year later the job was divided 3 ways and I ended up as the Annual Conference Coordinator. I coordinated 2 more conferences, 3 in total, before I moved to Portland, OR to pursue school. During my time at Peacemakers I had attended a mediation training course but wasn't really sure what to do with the information.

Back to Portland, As you may already realize, I didn't get very far in school ;) 3 years at community college doesn't add up to much. But lack of $$ is kind of hindrance.

During this time I'd been applying what I had learned at Peacemakers and in the book through different areas of my life and with my friends. Although not many people know me as someone who can help with conflict (perhaps I didn't advertise or didn't do a very good job of it myself), but we talked about it casually.

But I still love the ministry of peacemaking. Now it has extended past the ministry itself and into what God can do through reconciliation. Sometimes we don't actually solve or fix anything but we've reconciled with Christ or done what we could to reconcile with another. It's so powerful!! There can be so much hope in conflict. The Peacemaker material suggest we have 3 opportunities in every conflict we face, to glorify God, to serve others, and through those two things, to grow to be more like Christ. And just because you read that, you'll probably have a chance to use it... so watch out!! ;)

This past summer God provided some open doors to start a *Peacemaking Team at my church. Through prayer and green lights, our team of 4-8 (not sure how many it will end up being) are working through reading the book and doing the small group study together. We also have a Peacemaker Seminar on the calendar for January. I am STOKED to have an opportunity to be involved on this level!

God also provided the means for me to attend Peacemaker's Annual Conference and Conflict Coaching Training last week. I attended the coaching first and was graciously guided through sharing Christ-centered peacemaking principles with others through role-plays and demonstrations. I was amazed at how it all fell together and was SO thankful for the opportunity to learn these skills as we encounter people who need help with conflict in every area of life! (I've already had a chance to use some of what I learned!!) And my role-play partner even spoke redemptive and encouraging words to me as we role played sharing Christ's promises to someone dealing with heart issues of being "not-enough". I nearly cried!! And it was a role play!! I briefly shared with him my story of feeling inadequate to lead a team at church and he shared encouraging scripture with me.

By the end of the training on Thursday, before the conference even started, I felt like I had been filled more than I had hoped!!!!

The conference continued with amazing speakers and encouraging workshops that shared, over and over again, Christ and what he's done for us and why we do peacemaking. As Pastor John Stumbo so beautifully put it, "we don't do this [peacemaking] to get results. We do it because it's right." I could say so much more but I just wouldn't know where to start! Between the amazing people and the fantastic words I heard and the amazing flood of peace that God washed over my heart last week I just feel encouraged and eager to share with others what God has shared with me and confident that he has me where he wants me, even if I don't understand.

Other than being eager to share the excitement of all I absorbed last week, why am I saying all of this? For 2 reasons. 1 is selfish, I want to be held accountable for what I know. If I know that others are watching and that I've committed myself in so many ways, it will give me greater pause before responding in a conflict or potential conflict situation. And 2, because I want YOU to have the encouragement I've received.

May we seek to glorify God through your conflict and serve others as you grow to be more like Christ! If you want more info about all this, check out the links I included throughout my blog or let me know and we can talk about it. I'd love to share the hope of reconciliation!

*Dislaimer: it's not that Sunset or any church has more conflict than another or is in more desperate need of peacemaking than another, but that the church should be the example of reconciliation to others. Because Christ has given us (and everyone) the opportunity to reconcile to him! What more could we do for others than to extend them the same grace we've been extended. Not simply overlooking any offenses but by showing Christ in the way we resolve the offense or dispute, confessing our sins in the contribution we made to the situation and by forgiving, as Christ forgave us. It's really all about the gospel!!

Floaters

2008-09-22T11:33:00.000-07:00

Seems like our life is leveling out a little so there isn't as much to blog about. So I'll do the floating thought version...

- I'm excited to head out tomorrow morning for the Peacemaker conference. Not so excited about my super early flight, but it's a small price to pay. But I'm very much looking forward to taking the Conflict Coaching training and getting a refresher on how to help others through conflict, as well as attending the team workshops to learn as much as possible as we start our team here at Sunset. I'm feeling highly inadequate and I won't feel any more so after the event but at least I won't have as many excuses ;)

- Friday I had off so did crafts. Well, I spent the morning buying the supplies for my crafts and only worked on them for about 3 hours but got them finished!! You'll have to come by our place to see what I was working on (speaking of which, ladies I'm hosting a Demarle party which is mostly an excuse to have people over so if you didn't get my evite this morning let me know and I'll send it to you... all are invited!).

- My crafts were for our guestroom and something in me clicked this weekend and I got all inspired to work on putting our guestroom more together. We got a few things hung on the wall, plan to hang more, moved everything out of the room that didn't have a place to go to either a more permanent location or the garage for storage. I felt REALLY good about the progress and feel more ready to have people come by.

- I'm really enjoying my pieced-together schedule. I feel a bit like God hand selected the things I'm doing with just enough normality/routine, interest, responsibility, and money to make it all work. It's very fun!!

- After about 5+ phone calls and a cumilitive 20+ transfers and probably up to 3+ hours on the phone we still don't have our Internet/phone stuff finalized. We thought we had it mostly good to go until our Internet went out this weekend. Problem still isn't fixed. I HATE how long I'm on hold to get these things resolved. My last call I was transferred at least 4 different times to get to the right place and then finally gave up (although they did give me a phone number to call back... same number I called originally for the other thing I tried to take care of). For the most part I'm not unhappy with this company, just hate how long the calls take. Feels like I need to plan for at least 1.5 hours per "situation" I need to take care of.

- We are doing okay on our new budget so far, thank God! Although we're both making sacrifices and I find myself saying 'no' to things more often. We do get to occasionally say 'yes' but then the lack of cash in my wallet reminds me why I had been saying 'no' before. Not using cash sure helps you not be aware of the money you have. Using cash makes truth a hard reality. But we just do better on a cash-only budget.

- Soon I'll write about my current journey with God stuff. Right now I'm enjoying the GIFT Bible study and a renewed energy to spend time with God and being committed to attending the weekly Bible study.

Week in review

2008-09-13T22:34:00.000-07:00

I feel like I'm playing catch up.

Mark and I had a great time last weekend celebrating our 1st year wedding anniversary. It was on the 2nd (Tuesday) but we decided not to tell people and celebrate it that weekend since we both had to work the day of our anniversary and I had an evening meeting I couldn't get out of. Seemed like a lame way to celebrate so we pretended like it was the 6th instead.

We had a free night at a nearby Marriott so booked it for that night. I had the day off (Friday) so did some things around the house that morning and then scrapbooked with a friend in the afternoon. I picked Mark up around 5 and we headed to dinner. We decided to just drive towards our hotel and pick a place on the way. We opted for Bugattis, which is yummy! Especially their crazy-awesome garlic and oil dipping sauce. Not sure garlic was the right choice, but we both had it so I hear that makes it okay.

We got in our car and drove only about 2 blocks to the hotel. It really was so close to both our work places that we just laughed. Mark joked around when we went to check in and made loud comments like, "sure was a long trip from New York". We got into our room, which was nice and... well, I won't share the details ;) But we had a great little 18 hour overnighter.

Even though we didn't have much money to spend and stayed at a hotel close to like everything we do, it was still fun and we felt like we adequately celebrated. We didn't get each other anything but cards (which was sort of a funny story as well) and cried when we read what each other wrote. It was sweet.

This week I had my first nanny day and look forward to my Wednesday's in the future and worked a VeggieTales show up in Washington. I also committed to helping coordinate an event in January, received a gift of a plane ticket to the Peacemaker Conference in Florida for next week (the 23-28th), and might end up with another side project I have yet to confirm.

After yesterday's long day, it was nice to have a day at home with Mark. We slept late, relaxed with lots of dvds, cleaned (the place looks great!), took a walk to the store, and made a yummy dinner! I'm about to enjoy a little dessert before heading to bed since I need to be at church at 5am to open the doors for load-in for the VeggieTales show Sunset is hosting. It's a volunteer gig, but probably my last one as the new guy taking over events should be a shoe-in for working these if he's up for it.

This week Mark's parents are coming for a quick visit on Monday evening, I have a Peacemaking Ministry Team meeting on Tuesday night (at Sunset), GIFT on Wednesday night, the gym on Thursday night, and... I think half mild weekend before I head to Florida the following Tuesday. I hate leaving or being away from my husband but really thankful for the opportunity to go!

What I've been doing...

2008-09-08T21:35:00.000-07:00

- getting FIOS instead of DSL (apparently that's all they have in these new places, it's more expensive but super fast!)

- adjusting to my new schedule, you'll get no complaints out of me for having every Friday off!

- trying to keep our house in order, catching up on laundry, cooking, trying to organize things that I need to create an organizational system for, etc.

- enjoyed 6 fantastic days in MT for JR & Molly's Wedding!!

Yes, they ARE that good looking! And nice too ;)

Some of the fam at the reception. Oregon represent!

This week I'm looking forward to working a VeggieTales show in Washington on Friday and another one at Sunset on Sunday. I also have my first Wednesday nanny gig this week, which will be fun. For now I'm enjoying super fast FIOS ;)

Sort of checking out for a bit

2008-08-23T14:31:00.000-07:00

I'm at work right now. Things are flowing well at the wedding reception I'm helping with so I thought I'd take a break to rest my feet. Now that I'm married I really enjoy weddings. It's fun to attend with my husband because we get all the joys without it being OUR day! I love to remember our beautiful wedding day but look back with thankfulness that it's over. And really feel like it reflected who we are so I have no regrets.

Today is my last day as Event Coordinator here at Sunset. It's bittersweet. Bitter because I feel like I'm just starting to get a hang of things and really love helping make events come off wonderfully. I love thinking through details, planning for contingencies, and making decisions on the fly as things change. It's sweet because I feel God is ushering me into a new phase of life that he has his hand upon. He seemed to have his hand on this part of life, but there's something a little different about the next phase. Perhaps it's my renewed dependence on him or something, not sure.

To go along with my new phase of life I cut a little more off my hair than normal (I wanted a change and can't really do anything more drastic with my hair ;) when I saw my hair dresser on Thursday. I'm still getting used to it. I'm not one to shy away from hair change as I figure it will either grow out or fade so why not try it. I'd always wish I had if I chickened out at the last minute!

Mark comes home tomorrow and I'm SOO ready for him to be back!! I was never ready for him to be gone but don't think I could handle another day of him being away. Especially right now when I am thankful for him being the one stable and constant thing. He cares for me in a way I never imagined and I appreciate being able to care for him in return. We truly have the sweetest union and it's far better than I had hoped or dreamed!!!

After I leave work today (in a couple hours) I'm not going to be at email, blogs, etc much for a week. We don't have Internet up at home yet (I've just been lazy and haven't called after we discovered it wasn't working) and leave early Tuesday morning for a week in MT for some family time. I love the timing of this trip as it gives me time to separate from my work here and come back refreshed and ready to hit the ground running with my new work. And I'm SOOO looking forward to time with the family!! I love celebrations and occasions to rejoice and take pictures!